Han ko Liplipatan.....

The Road To My NEW Car

2011-11-16T23:12:00.000+09:00

Buying a car a new car is not an easy decision. I have to study my finances, I have to consider everything before I do my purchase. Although I planned to get my car this December, I instead decided to get it on February.

This is what I have done so far.

1. Join Team Celerio Philippines

This is the support group of the car of my choice. I choose Suzuki Celerio because it is the most fuel efficient car here in the Philippines today. Although the Team Celerio will tell you that to have a 34.34km/L fuel mileage is quite a feat and in reality is quite hard to do, it is still achievable. Some had done modifications with their car and most importantly, one has to change his/her driving habits. A celerio has a tachometer that is very visible for its driver. The tachometer measure your fuel efficiency. Keep a tachometer reading of 2000rpm. keep your tires 39psi front and 36psi on the rear tires, put in a petrol with the recommended octane level, avoiding traffic jams and lessen the use of aircon could result to a fuel mileage close to the 34.34km/L target.

2. Visited the casa.

I did that last Sunday. I met up with the SA and I learned a lot about the car. I know that right now, there are no new units still, and it will become available on end of Nov or early December. I also learned the price of the celerio and their price offer.

3. Consider other purchase options

A bank called me yesterday to tell me about their offer. Comparing the prices (since I will not pay in full for the car), I learned that the best offer will come from PS Bank. The in-house financing of the casa has interest that ranges from 10-11% per annum. PS Bank has interest a lot less than that. Just roughly 4.3% per annum. Although the freebies are not as good as with the casa, at least I get to save a lot from their offer.

With that prepared, I am now ready to purchase my car. But the last thing I have to do is

4. Prepare a the down payment.

I could buy it right now and sacrifice my savings.

Or I'll buy it in February and have those money invested right now in the stock market. Of course, since I am a financial advisor, I did the latter. I am quite positive that right now is the best time to get into stock trading. And I'm quite good at it. All the stocks I bought were matched!

The road to my new car won't be easy. Another premise to that achievement is for me to loose 5kg!

That is, I will only buy my car if I get to loose 5kg! And I am serious.

My boyfriend is not happy with this decision. He doesn't trust my driving skills. But I will work on convincing him that the car I am buying is perfect for me, and although it will cost me money, I will make sure it will produce money in return. I plan to do more dealerships especially since I'll be more mobile when I get my car.

And that's the plan for 2012.... I am going to get that car! No matter what it takes.

Buying A New Car (Suzuki Celerio MT)

2011-11-13T10:08:00.003+09:00

I am planning to buy a new car.
This is my choice. A Suzuki Celerio Manual Transmission.

I will be going to the casa today. Just to inquire but I am planning to buy a new car because I needed it to boost business.
Why is this my choice?
1. It fits my budget.
2. It is the most fuel efficient car right now here in the Philippines at 34.34km/L although according to Team Celerio Philippines the average fuel consumption is 9-15km/L for city driving and around 20-30 km/L for highway driving. The challenge for me is to beat that fuel efficiency! Hehe. Since I am used to driving at 80kph and I drive carefully and I avoid pressing the brakes to much, I think I can achieve that.
3. I am usually 90% alone in the car. If I have passengers it's usually just 2 or 3.
4. I need it badly for my job as a financial advisor.
5. Since I have two jobs, my time is budgeted for my jobs. I don't compromise my time with my lovedones. I want to be always there if they need me and that I believe is achievable if I have a car. Well, at least it's easier to go from point A to point B.

Here though are the downsides
1. My monthly savings will decrease. (Solution: To get in more sales.)
2. Car maintenance could be a hassle. (Solution: Deal with it. That comes with the car.)
3. I have to be mindful of the weather. Since this is a small car, flooded streets should be noted and avoided as much as possible.

There. If I get my car, my lazy days are over.
Yeah.

Projects and Investments

2011-11-04T21:27:00.000+09:00

It is already November! One more month before December and then it's goodbye 2011.
I had been too busy this year. I have two jobs and numerous projects and investments that occupies most of my time. Obviously, I've been working too hard to earn money. Although for me, it is really not about earning money, it is the challenge of beating inflation.
How do I get to manage all my activities?
I bought a small notebook. In it, I put all that I have to do. Prospects I need to close. Obligations I need to pay and payments I need to collect. I am also very religious in my accounting of my daily expenses.
I've pointed out from my previous entry what my problem really is. It is searching for what drives me. Until now, I am still in search for that very specific reason. In general though, I am sure that my reason should be to do everything for God's glory. That should only be my mindset. Knowing that, I now focus on what keeps me from doing that specific goal.
Again, from my soul searching (which I obviously do a lot), I found out that my main problem is that I don't keep my word. I say many things I don't mean. I usually blurt out words, saying it with conviction and then change my mind about it later. Again this inconsistency had been such a nasty habit. It is the only reason why I still haven't become what I expected myself to be. The only person that hinders me from achieving my goal is myself. And I intend to do something about it. One step at a time.
Second habit I have to change is to stop being judgmental. I am a self proclaimed anti-social. I hate the crowd. But I believe this is not healthy and therefore I should also change that.
Beating inflation has been a game for me. That's what my projects and investments are for. Right now, I have allocated my funds for my various projects and investments. Since it is November and year-end is approaching, investing season for me for this year is already over.
It will be harvesting time from now on and save more funds.
I'd like a big balance in my checking account this year-end. That I believe should be something to look forward to.

End of 3rd Quarter 2011

2011-09-04T20:47:00.001+09:00

Ber months are here, Christmas is around the corner, and it's the end of 3rd quarter.

I was supposed to be busy with my jobs, but I've been lazy this past few days, I don't have my usual drive. It's quite frustrating. But of course, that's an internal problem I have to resolve.

My problem is that I am consistently inconsistent. And that's just bad because I can't have a pace if I'm inconsistent.

I've been encountering problems with my jobs and these are because I tend to get lazy and slack off sometimes.
I got older again last month, and I still encounter these same problems. Even if I'd want all these to change, truth is I will still go back to this habit.

What's driving me? I guess that's just something I have to answer and I just have to anchor myself on that thought...

Right now though, I'm quite sure that I'm not okay yet.

I'm sure this is just a phase, this will probably change over time...

Hopefully.

Payaman!

2011-07-10T13:07:00.001+09:00

I'll get there.
My vision board is in figures. I don't need pics to keep me motivated, when I want something I research about it, know how much it will cost me and I work out that figure.
And I am sure I will get there.

I learn a lot of things working as Sun Life Financial Advisor. (I am also a full time Structural Engineer.) But honestly, I find my part time job as a financial advisor more rewarding. Although right now, I can't give up engineering yet because the reality is there are too many projects and sadly there are only few engineers. That's the scenario here in the Philippines. There's a lot of Nursing grads though. Well. That's thanks to the parents who want their kids to work as caregivers abroad.

There will be a lot of projects here in the Philppines. That's what I believe. As a developing country there are a lot of infrastructures that has to be done, and again, few engineers to design them. Most of our engineers are working overseas. SAD. Too many nurses though.

Anyway, that's not what this entry is about. This is about me getting richer. And as I said, I am positive I'll get
there. I will just share the lessons I learned from Chinkee Tan's talk on our last branch meeting.

Like fire, there are also 3 things that creates SUCCESS. These are attitude, skills and knowledge. Skills and knowledge can be easily achieved through effort. You enroll yourself in college and attend lots of seminars and you'll get the skills and knowledge you need. Attitude though is different. It is something you have to change from within. And this is what he focused on in his discussion. And the bottomline of it is that, there are just 4 pointers to remember in getting or setting up the right attitude for an individual to achieve success.

Remember this pointers:
1. Be positive.
2. Be consistent.
3. Be persistent.
4. Be a visionary.

Apply all four and with skills and knowledge, success is just around the corner.
So here is what I say when they say, "Oi,kumusta." (Hey, how are you?)
My answer here now is, "Eto, payaman!" ^_^ (Here. Getting richer.)

Emerging Leader

2011-06-29T21:14:00.000+09:00

I am an emerging leader!
I'll be attending a program in my company which will make me an effective leader.
This will be good for my future career in politics. ^_^

New Netbook!

2011-06-26T13:42:00.000+09:00

I'm very happy with my latest purchase.
I bought a Neo B3380 Netbook and I'm quite happy with it's performance. It is very fast compared to the old laptop I was using. Yey!
I bought it t Php13,800.00. Cheaper than the Neo's suggested retail price which is 16K.
I'll probably write more now that I've a faster computer.

Updating

2011-06-12T07:42:00.000+09:00

Okei. I admit I tend to get lazy. But I'm still hoping that's curable.
Anyway, just to update since my last entry.
I'm very happy right now since I've found my pace. Meaning, now I'm able to manage all my activities without pressure. I switched jobs (since I just transferred again to another of my previous company), and then I also have a part time job as a financial advisor (right now, I'm doing it part time but it will be my lifetime career especially since I'll quit my job as an engineer when I get married and be a full time housewife and mother, and then still be part time financial advisor... and hopefully part time municipal councilor. haha!)
Anyway, the best is that I deliver to all my ministries. I have three ministries right now. My full time job, my part time job, and my ministry for my loved ones and my community.
I guess right now I could say that I've found my direction. Everything's manageable. Although I still encounter difficult people along the way, still with my current disposition, I'm able to manage everything very well (I think)
And all of this I'm able to do because my faith is well grounded. I start my day by reading the bible, praying and conversing with God and that moment with Him is what I call our daily conference and which gives me all the things I need in order to do my functions according to his will.
Bottomline, I am very happy.
Indeed I am in the right path.
Although there are still obstacles along the way, everything is manageable.
And that's all thanks to GOD.
Because it is really Him who gives me direction.

When all Else Fails, Press RESTART

2011-03-27T12:11:00.002+09:00

Again, it's been a while since my last entry.
A lot of things has happened since then.
I'm moving on again to another company. My work experience is somewhat complicated. It's not that I jump from one company to another but the thing is I go back to my previous companies. Hopefully, this one will be the last, after this, I'm changing industries. I plan to venture into business but that will have to happen to later.
Still too busy with my current job. I'm hating it, but I've no choice. I'm grateful of course for giving another chance to be working with them but this time, it's all just about the compensation. I need to build my funds for my future businesses.
Anyway, going back to my subject for this entry.

My computer sucks! It's too slow!! It tests my patience!
But now I know a way to deal with it. When all programs takes forever to process, RESTART!
It's more effective than waiting.
Life is like that, I guess. If all else fails, maybe it's not meant for you, maybe you're doing something wrong.
RESTART.
That's the key word.
That's what you have to do when all else fails. Restarting does not mean giving up. It means trying again.
And from what I've learned, it really helps. It erases the stress brought about by being impatient.
And with this cursed laptop's case, restarting made the processes go a little bit faster. (At least now I can tolerate its speed.)
Sometimes, surprisingly, technology teaches us lessons about life.
So remember, when all else fails, RESTART.

This time, I intend to blog more.
Life is good. I've been blessed with the jobs I get, and I plan to give back these blessings to my loved ones, family and my community.
Amidst what's happening with our world, we just have to praise God that we all are still alive.
And no matter how busy I get, I will still be happy because God will not give me a cross I'm not able to carry.
Holy week is coming. My cross maybe heavy but God had blessed me with the capacity to carry it all throughout my journey.
Again, all this for God's glory.

PMS

2010-12-05T14:20:00.000+09:00

It's already December and year 2010 is ending soon. I became 27 this year yet my body and mind feels like a lot older. I look a lot older too. Like 35 I guess, with five kids and a DOM-type husband.
Obviously, today is not a good day for me. Or even the days before now. I blame it with PMS.
On good days, I'm usually very happy and jolly. I laugh and smile a lot, but it has been a week that I'm in this gloomy mood. I just feel so negative.
It's the time of the month again when I feel so destructive. I hate everything. I'm very irritable. I feel like a monster and I think I look like one too.

And suddenly I am not in the mood to write anymore. Because it tires me to write about my insecurity, of how I think badly of myself.
But don't take me seriously. As I said, this is just PMS.

Ashamed of Becoming Filipino

2010-08-26T09:51:00.000+09:00

NEWS ARTICLE REFERENCE ---> CLICK HERE

Last Monday, at the climax of the hostage taking crisis, when Mendoza fired his automatic M16 rifle, I was really crying (sobbing actually) because I could not contain my emotions. My heart breaks for the hostages and the hostage taker. At that time, I am not proud of becoming Filipino. That hostage taking should have not ended like that! And now I put the blame to the people who should have given the right orders because they have the authority and position in the government to do so but were very stupid because they did not do what was expected of them!
Mendoza's demand is simple. He wanted to be reinstated and he want the ombudsman to hear his case at that same day. He was desperate, he did not intend to kill those people but I think nobody in the government took him seriously.
I am ashamed of the Philippine government. The whole world should pity us Filipinos because our current government has no capabilities to protect all of us. The police officers who should have been our protectors are like terrorists on that hostage taking crisis. They agitated their own former colleague by harassing his brother. The way they handled their rescue just created more damages not just for the bus but even to the hostages.
Those government officials involved have no care about the life of the ordinary person. Because if they did, they should have promised Mendoza on that first hour that hostage crisis was televised, that he will be reinstated.
Life is always most important.
I was very ashamed of this officials because by taking NO ACTION and making NO COMMENT or statement, they have announced to the whole world that they do not care of the life of a common individual be it a Filipino citizen or not.
If the world is reading this, please do not curse the Filipino nation because the majority of us CONDEMNS the government for taking NO ACTION. A typical Filipino cares a lot even if the people involve in the crisis are foreigners. In fact, the typical Filipino cares more of the needs of our guests and visitors. Sadly, those who are seated at our government do not share that value of the common Filipino.

I was ashamed of becoming Filipino. But I realized today that I am still proud of myself because I did not vote for those people who are now seating at the high positions of our government. God knows I tried my best to stand my ground last May 10 elections and voted for who I think will best serve our country. And for that reason, the Filipino nation will still thrive because not all of us are stupid. Please note, NOT ALL FILIPINOS ARE STUPID, UNFORTUNATELY THE ONES WHO ARE ON THE TOP POSITIONS OF OUR GOVERNMENT ARE NOT JUST STUPID, THEY ARE INDIFFERENT. Time will come when all these indifferent people who are currently seating at the high seats of the government will fall because everyone (even the whole world) will realize how stupid and heartless they are.
It is a matter of eventuality.

To the world, please expect that at this point in time, with this current administration we're having, that you will not be safe here in the Philippines. Don't worry though, because the worries should be on us, Filipino citizens, because we ourselves can't count on our government. When worst comes to worst, the current administration will isolate itself to the crisis and leave us, the common Filipino, to die. Consider yourself lucky because you're not here. Consider yourself lucky because you're not Filipino. Indeed, the choice of the majority had endangered each one of us and therefore like a one big family, we just have to live with the mistake of the majority... but I am positive, this dark period of the Filipino nation will come to an end at the proper time. Because, please remember, NOT ALL FILIPINOS ARE STUPID. Even if the thinking Filipino is only a minority, GOD will be with us. Someday, we will prevail.

Bobo daw si Erap pero may puso naman para sa maliliit na Pilipino...
Si GMA naman mautak nga pero wala raw syang amor sa masa...
Eh si Noynoy... di na nga kahusayan, parang wala pang puso kasi wala syang pakialam.
Pilipino.... kailan ka gigising????

All of us are connected.
The choice of the majority last May 10 had killed 9 people last August 23, a Monday evening.
8 of them were tourists coming from Hongkong who came to the Philippines to have a vacation.
1 was the hostage taker, a dismissed police official who wanted to be heard, for him it was a desperate time that needed desperate measure. He just wanted to be heard, it was not his intention to kill.
None of these people deserve to die last Monday.

But their life was not the priority of the government.
Because if it was, then all of them should have been alive today.

My Dream is To Become A Housewife

2010-08-09T20:53:00.000+09:00

When you get to think about it, it's the simple person's dream. It's very attainable.
But in my case, to become a housewife would mean to leave my career behind. I had been independent since college and to become a housewife means to submit to your husband and expect him to provide everything your family needs.
At this point in time, I know that money (or the lack of it) is always an issue to a husband and wife. And so, right now, my boyfriend and I are saving for that time when we already decide to settle down. He knows I want to be home-based and I plan to be a full-time mom and wife.
I want to be always available to my family. They will be my first priority and I will see through all their needs. I will teach and train my kids and be the parent who is always there for them. I plan to be the wife who will always be there to support my husband. The type who will give him a massage after a tiring day at work, and give him the motivation he needs when he is frustrated with his job. The one who will cook his baon and prepare his stuff for office.
I will take care of our house, our garden and our pets.
And I will always be available for my parents and my parents-in-law especially if they need someone to help them with something.

As I said in my last blog, being 27 would mean I am ready for bigger challenges and responsibility. I believe, marriage will come to us when we get 30 so we still have around three years to prepare our finances.
As for me, becoming a housewife would mean no monthly income. I'd be dependent to my husband which I don't really mind, and which I actually look forward to. Hehe.

And to become a housewife would mean, I'll have more time for the more important things in life.

27

2010-08-08T22:20:00.000+09:00

Tomorrow is my birthday.
I will be 27 years old.

What have I accomplished so far?
I could say that I've been successful because I have achieved all my aspirations.
At 27, I am happy with the rate my life is going. My next dream is to get married, take care of my family and be a housewife. I would want to personally take care of my husband and kids in the future.
I'm really a simple dreamer. I have very specific intentions which I fulfill, I guess, because I exactly know what I want.

Plan for the next years...
I also want to have my own business. To leave the employee status and be an entrepreneur. It's a long shot but it's something which I will be focusing into for the next years. My bf and I are on the same path with this aspiration.

What does being 27 mean to me?
It means having more responsibility and taking bigger challenges.
To become someone who can be depended on. To be someone with the wisdom to make the right decisions at all times.
People will now count on me and what I do and say, and for that, I should be dependable and mature.

Age is just a number.
We see the changes physically. But in my heart, I will always have the heart of a child. I take joy over simple things. I thank GOD for every good thing that happen in my life. I promise myself that I will always have a cheerful heart, smile more and remain positive about life.

Blessed
Yes, I've been blessed. And may GOD bless me more so I could also be a blessing to other people.

Pana-panahon

2010-07-17T19:14:00.000+09:00

Busy Season Para sa Project

Wala lang. Trip ko lang ito ilagay dito kasi ang buhay ko ngayon ay halos umiikot sa structure na to. Mga ilang manhour na rin ang nagamit ko para madesign tong pipe rack na to.

Okei naman ang trabaho. Sana laging busy para nde ako nag-iisip ng kung anu ano.

Hanggang September ko dapat to gagawin eh. By September, dapat asa fabricator na yung drawings nito. Sana walang maging aberya. Sana hindi sakit ng ulo ang piping. Sana marami akong maging OT para marami akong pera. At sana lagi akong healthy kahit super pa ang OT. AMEN.

Hindi Pa Siguro Panahon...

Nung Mierkules dapat magkocontract signing ako sa sideline ko. Pero unsuccessful sya. alam ko hindi dapat ako nagpapaniwala sa mga signs pero, umpisa pa lang ng Wednesday, July 14, panget na araw ko. Paglabas ko, grabe ang kalat na dala ni Basyang, yung mga sanga ng punong kahoy eh kalat kalat sa labas ng bahay pati yung ibang mga gamit sa labas na naihangin. Pagsakay ko ng bus, ang general mood eh dapat daw walang pasok.

Pagdating ko sa Makati, walang kuryente, challenge ngayon ang pagdaan sa Underpass! Tapos, contract signing yun pupuntahan ko at ayaw ko sanang ma-late, kaya super nagmadali ako at halos madulas dulas pa ako, pagdating ko dun sa building, walang kuryente at ang sabi baka umuwi na lang daw yung staff kasi wala sila kuryente! All the while, ang alam ko ay dun gaganapin yung contract signing na yun! Saka sinabi sa akin na hindi daw pala dun! Ibang building pala!!!!

Hay naku! Dun pa lang naisip ko na, para dito ba ako? Nakausap ko naman yung secretary at sabi nya makakahabol pa daw ako. Ang sabi ko sa isip ko, sige, diretso muna ako dun. Pag nireject nila ako, saka ako susurrender.

Daan uli sa mas madidilim na underpass...

Pagdating ko dun, late na ako, sinungitan pa ako nung receptionist.

Eh di ba contract signing yung pinuntahan ko? Ngayon, wala akong form na pipirmahan, dahil sabi nung masungit na receptionist, "Late kasi kayo."

Kaya, nde ko na itinuloy. Umuwi na lang ako. Kasi ang pananaw ko, ang contract signing, dapat tama yung rason ng pagpirma mo. Dapat umpisa pa lang tama na. Kasi kelangan dyan ng commitment. Sa daloy ng mga pangyayari, hindi ako naging handa sa pagpirma.

At yun ang dahilan kung bat hindi ko sya itinuloy.

Me panahon naman para sa lahat ng bagay. Tingin ko lang, yung araw na yun ay hindi pa panahon para mag-contract signing ako.

Ulat Panahon Naman

Introducing Basyang. Ang unang bagyo sa Pilipinas ngayong taong ito. Ang HULA ng PAGASA nung Martes ng gabi eh mag-laland fall daw ito sa Casiguran, Quezon. Signal number 1 pa lang ang Maynila nung mga alas otso ng gabi.

Nung dumating ang alas dyes, sobrang lakas na ng hangin. Tingin ko pinakamalakas kasi na parte ng bagyo eh hindi yung pinakamalapit sa mata eh, kung hindi yung medyo malapit lang sa mata at ang HULa ko ang Maynila ay naandun sa parteng yun nung dumaan si Basyang. Nung oras na yun, unang bayo ng hangin, galing sa East yung hangin. Sumunod na malakas na bayo eh mga alas kuatro na ata ng madaling araw at eto yung paalis na yung bagyo at nagiba na ng direksyon ang hangin.

Pinuyat rin ako ng bagyong ito. Ang hirap makatulog kung pumapasok yung hangin na me kasamang tubig ulan sa kwarto mo.

Pana-panahon ang pagkakataon

Maibabalik ba ang kahapon?
Eto yung sabi nung kanta. At siguro eto rin yung pinakarason ko kaya malungkot ako nitong huling araw. Hindi ko man maibalik ang kahapon, sana me natutunan akong leksyon mula rito.

Sa buhay naman, ang pinakamahalaga lagi ay yung ngayon.

Back to Alabang

2010-05-31T22:07:00.000+09:00

I'm back in the city!
And I hate it. At least I'm in Alabang, away from traffic (since my home is close to my workplace), but this is still very far. It so south! Haaay.
Oh well, one thing, I'm here to earn! And that's what I will be doing so I will definitely cut off unnecessary expenses.

FYI, I'm back also on my first job. Not anymore as a regular employee but a subcontract. After this project, I'm vacation mode again.

Putting My Eggs On Different Baskets

2010-05-22T22:44:00.000+09:00

That's what I learned from my five-day training course in Sunlife.

Right now, analyzing my life, I think I'll be putting that lesson to practice. And that would mean, I will be very busy.

Mula sa mahabang bakasyon, busy-busyhan naman ngayon. I hope I can manage.

On June 7, I'll be back to my employee-life. Anyway, it will only be temporary. Just until the projects ends.

And then, I currently have a project of my own, which is developing the plan drawings and estimate of a family house which my batch mate had commissioned me to do.

Also, I plan to do Sunlife part-time. And it is my advocacy to have all my batchmates have a Sunlife policy. It is important that we all get our life insurance now that we are young and still insurable.

And, that's how I put my eggs on different baskets.
Here's hoping for the best.

Baguio Trip (May 15, 2010)

2010-05-22T10:17:00.000+09:00

The trip did not start right. We came from Victory Liner-Caloocan Terminal, and we don't have a ticket reservation, so we were chance passengers. We departed from the terminal Friday (May 14) at 11:30PM and since we don't have a decent seat, we endured the first three hours of the trip in a really uncomfortable position. Fortunately, we were seated when we got to Siesta at Tarlac City.

We arrived at Baguio on Saturday (May 15) at 4AM.

It was very early and it wasn't very cold in Baguio (probably because it's summer), the temperature was about 20degC.

I'll dub that trip as: College Reminisce Tour & Anna's Wedding

The tour started at my first boarding house when I was first year college. I always keep a good relationship with my landlady. I treat them like my mother in the city. And so, at 4AM, we went straight to my first boarding house at DPS Compound. Even at that early, Auntie Chit received me and my bf very warmly. Hehe. She offered us hot coffee and a fresh loaf of bread.

Then we walked to SM, then to Governor's Pack to have my package delivered by Victory Liner to Pangasinan. The package was just my dirty clothes, Mama's Wella Hair Coloring, and Ate Jean's Reader's Digest. I paid Php80.00 for it, and at 4PM they dropped the package at Martinez' hardware. Mama picked it up.

Second stop, my boarding house at Bonifacio Street, this is located just opposite SLU's Otto Hahn Building (Building for the College of Engineering and Architecture), where I got to chat again with Uncle Merto and Auntie Cita, my landlord and landlady. I stayed at this boarding house from second year college till I graduated.

Then, we had breakfast at Marosan's, just opposite of SLU main gate and we ordered Marosan Rice priced at Php60.00 (it was Php45.00 when I was college).

And then from SLU, we walked our way to Session Road. It was around 9AM at that time.

We left our baggage (we only have a SM-green bag with us) at Tiong San. Then we head at Burnham Park.

These are the activities we did at Burnham:

1. Boating - Php120.00 unlimited (or so we believe). Parking on the lake though is prohibited. There was a boater who parked on the middle of the lake and they slept on the boat, but after a while, the boat operators came to tell them that's not allowed. Boating is a nice exercise. Our boat was one with pedals so we really had a blast circling the Burnham lake. GPT even became an expert maneuvering the boat. We got tired after two hours (I guess), and it's getting sunny so we decided to dock. GPT had a perfect parking on the first try and then when I told him to do it again and I'll take his video, he probably became conscious and he couldn't do it anymore. Obviously, the first try was just tsamba.

2. Taho!!! Only in Baguio will you find the strawberry flavored taho. It costs Php15.00 and it has fresh strawberries in it. It's delicious! GPT wants more but then the taho vendor is gone. He probably dreamt about it on our way home.

3. Picture taking - I love taking pictures of flowers, plants, sites, and people busy with their various activities.

4. Biking- We don't have the energy for this anymore.

5. Other activities being offered in Burnham- You'll be surprised! They offer manicure, pedicure, facial, massage, and vendors abound, selling fresh fruits, beverages, turon, taho, flute, toys, and what-have-yous.. they are all in Burnham! It's a very busy park. But the irony though is even if with these activities one could always find a corner a Burnham to relax.

Orchidarium

This is located just beside Burnham Park.
I love plants!!! I really do and if only I've brought a car, I've probably bought herbs to start my herbal garden, and roses to add to my collection.

Food Trip!
I've to admit a road trip for us is synonymous to food trip. And so, we had our breakfast at Marosan's where we ordered Marosan Rice. This is a plate with rice, mixed veggies- Baguio's freshly picked harvest, lechon kawali, sunny side up egg and lechong manok. They usually serve free soup but since we're very early the soup is still not ready.

At lunch, we ate at Sizzling Steak along Session Road. This is a smoky resto (understandable because of the sizzling plates). Hehe. And it's hot inside since it's lunch time. But the food is just great! I ordered garlic steak (ata yun) Php105.00, GPT had chicken steak Php130.00, this is served with free mushroom soup. The steak is served with java rice, steamed Baguio beans and potato fries. Yum, yum, yum!!

Anna's Wedding

This was actually our main reason of going to Baguio. The wedding was at 2:00PM at Baguio Cathedral. Anna was my batchmate in High School. We're not really close back then but still we knew each other way back in our teen-age days.

Now, most of my batchmates are getting married and starting a family.

Time flies... But as they say, age is just a number.

The Baguio trip is BITIN because we were there for just a day. If you plan to explore more of Baguio, rent a house for 3 or more days. It's okay to commute because taxis in Baguio are cheap and these are SUVs so they're very convenient if you're going with a group.

Our budget was Php2000.00/each. That includes our fare and our pocket money and we did not exceeded! I believe we even have like Php300.00 left. Marami pa kaming nauwing pasalubong! Yey!!

I believe we're going back on December. Family trip naman.
Sa totoo lang masarap gumala sa Baguio, kahit nga 24 hours kang asa galaan hindi big deal kasi malamig sa labas at busy naman forever ang Session Road. Kesa magpunta ng HK or Singapore, Baguio na lang ako. Solve na solve kami sa totoo lang. Kakapagod kasi day tour pero super duper saya!

Why I Vote G1BO as President

2010-05-05T11:05:00.000+09:00

Just 5 days before the Philippine national elections! And of course if you watch the news, the automated elections seems to have encountered a MAJOR setback. But well, I trust that the COMELEC will do its job. Call me Miss Sunshine. Hehe. It's just that all election-related news had been very stressful to hear, I decided I won't be affected. I will do my job. I'll exercise my right to vote on May 10 and keep myself informed. I like the fact that we will be having automated elections. I say, it's about the time. I just do hope COMELEC will fix the problems regarding the flash drives....

Here are the facts about my candidate, Gilberto "G1BO" Teodoro:
Born: June 14, 1964

Elementary & Secondary (Xavier)
Major in Management Financial Institution, De La Salle University (1981-1985)

Bachelor of Laws, UP Diliman (1985-1989) Dean's Medal for Academic Excellence

Bar Topnotcher (1989)

Master of Law, Harvard School (1996-1997)

Congressman, 1st District, Tarlac (1998-2007)

Secretary, Dept. of National Defense (2007-2009)

Philippine Legion of Honor Awardee, Degree of Grand Commander

MY IMPRESSION: At 45 years old, G1BO knows what he wants and he does his best to achieve it. He has accomplished a lot. He is such an inspiration, the type of person whom all Filipinos should strive to emulate.

His PLATFORM:

1. "Ang nagbubungkal ng lupa, siya dapat ang yumayaman. Mayaman na ani... mayaman na kita.. marami at masaganang pagkain."

MY TAKE ON THIS: If you put agriculture as top priority, all else will be given attention. It's like chain reaction. New infrastuctures will be built like roads for transport of farm produce, irrigation, availability of jobs on the rural area would make the city less crowded and when agriculture is priority, land will be used for farming, new farming technology will be developed, food will be in abundance, Philippines can export, aviation & shipping would follow... and then Philippines will get rich.

2. "Pag me de-kalidad na edukasyon, kahit di makapagtapos kayang mabuhay ng marangal, kayang gamitin ang karunungan sa anumang trabaho.."

MY TAKE ON THIS: The reason of the young generation being corrupted with the JEJEMON virus is because we don't have quality education. The young generation follows the fad dictated by multimedia. Sadly, this country is also lacking of devoted teachers.

For quality education, we need the following: school buildings should be improved, classrooms should have good ventilation, pupils per class should be limited to 30, the education system should be reviewed, curriculum should be revised. Teachers should be paid well, the government should pay for their continued learning since education is dynamic. Libraries should have good books. The government should make it a policy that there should be no out of school youth in this country!

3. "Murang pabahay sa lugar na malapit sa inyong trabaho."

MY TAKE ON THIS: To prevent squatters.

4. "De kalidad na pangangalaga ng kalusugan ng kahit sino basta't Pilipino."

MY TAKE ON THIS: Each town should have a well-equipped community hospital. Each Filipino should have a Philhealth card. More benefits on Philhealth.

5. "Puhunan sa negosyo para sa mga ina at kabataan."

MY TAKE ON THIS: Promoting entrepreneurship to the women and youth. So everyone can earn if they want to.

I vote for G1BO and I don't care what the survey says.

I love my country and I believe that as long as there are Filipinos who tries their best no matter what obstacle they encounter, then there is hope for this land.

Manalo, matalo, para sa kin panalo si G1BO. He's still very young. That is his edge amongst his opponents... I believe in his vision for this country and I'll stand with him as my president till the very end.

baranggay fiesta

2010-04-27T15:32:00.000+09:00

April 23 & 24 (Friday and Saturday) was our Baranggay Fiesta.

Papa had a pig, ducks and a turkey (all from our farm) prepared and cooked for the occasion.

There really is not much to tell. I have not invited anyone over so all the guests that came are all friends of Papa.

I wish someday I will organize the fiesta.

I will have fireworks display for sure.

The Week That Was HOLY

2010-04-05T12:29:00.004+09:00

How did you spend your holy week?

Most people nowadays especially the city dwellers use the holy week for some R&R which usually means heading to the beach.

I spent mine immersing in Filipino traditions that are being observed during Holy week and here are what I have learned and experienced.

4PM, Maundy Thursday, St. John Parish Chapel, Infanta, Pangasinan.

The reenactment of Jesus' washing of the feet of His 12 apostles.

The main teaching here is SERVICE. No matter who you are, you are called to SERVE. Each of us should serve one another.

However, it is sad to realize that most people today expects the latter. I mean, inspect yourself. Most of the time you expect service from other people. If you don't get it, you get irate. But Jesus Christ's teaching opposes that emotion. He says, we should serve one another. And Him washing the feet of his disciples goes to show that even a God could serve a lowly human being. And what's more surprising is that he does not seem to mind.

MY ACTION: Next time I don't get good service from establishments, I'll be patient. I'll say my comments in a real peaceful manner. I will still smile. If they really suck on service, I'll take note on that, with red BOLD letters in my mind and make sure I don't go there again. Bottom line at least I still served my role as the good-natured costumer.

Vigil
After the washing of the feet, the tabernacle was left open, the Holy Eucharist which was covered with white cloth was paraded around the church’s interior until it gets to the area where it would be set for the vigil attendees to watch over throughout the night.

Good Friday, St. John Parish Chapel, Infanta, Pangasinan.

5AM, The Way Of The Cross

(My first time to attend throughout my lifetime.)

There was a big cross which was carried by the apostles followed by the faithful. Starting at the church, it was carried from one station-altar to another that are positioned on different strategic locations around town. The faithful would be chanting a verse getting to the station, and upon arriving, the family that arranged the altar would be leading a prayer/reflection. There were 14 stations in all, with the last station set on the church. At the end, the cross was fixed up at the front of the church for all to see.

The main in teaching of the reflections was the INDIFFERENCE of the people in the time of Christ. As people of today, we are reminded to take our stand and do something, instead of waiting for something to happen, or waiting for someone to do something for us. Jesus Christ was crucified, perhaps, because it was the will of his Father, but His suffering was a lesson for all of us. What the people did back then should not be repeated by US today. That should be crystal clear for all of us by now.

3PM, Veneration of the Cross, Procession

The reading about the Passion of Christ was a narration/dialogue. The Cross of Jesus Christ was placed in front for all to venerate.

The procession of course is attended by a lot of people. That has always been the case. NOTE: Instead of talking while walking en route of the procession, pray the rosary. You’ll feel holier at the finish line and you won’t feel bored. We were able to pray 2 mysteries throughout the procession.

TRIVIA on the Santo’s Karo Used During Processions
Santo Bankay. Nazareno. Lady of Sorrows. San Pedro. Veronica (this image was absent this year).
These were the images being paraded during the procession. (I’m not so sure, so I’ll update if there is addition to this info.)
This has been the tradition since the time of the Spaniards. As such, according to my father, each “Santo” (the term pertaining to the statues) has a corresponding farmland attached to it. This was for the maintenance of the Santo and for arranging of its Karo (float) whenever Holy Week arrives. Of course, at this time, no one is really sure if the Santo’s wealth is still used appropriately. Hard times come and pass. Our town had been through a lot of raging storms, life is still more important than a statue.
But still, those Santos are a reflection of our belief and our culture. Some of them are the ages of our forefathers, it is sad that the caring of them was not passed through generations. Is this the same with our traditions? Will they just fade and be forgotten? What will become of the Pinoy culture then? Will we become a nation known to follow the fad? Is this the result of progress and advancement?
Endless questions that leads me off the topic… so back to the subject!

Black Saturday, St. John Parish Chapel, Infanta, Pangasinan.

8PM, Easter Vigil

(My ultimate sacrifice!)

Bonfire lit outside the church, the priest then marked the paschal candle with pins symbolizing that Christ our God is the alpha and omega and lights it after with the bonfire. All lights throughout the chapel is turned off. The faithful, lead by the priest marches inside the church with candles lit up. The priests chants… and chants he does all throughout his service.
(And so the start of my ultimate sacrifice. I was very sleepy. The chanting makes me feel like so!)
Easter Vigil is about the faithful, waiting for the Resurrection of Jesus Christ. Seven readings were read. (The readings are in Ilocano, plus the chanting… Man! I’m so sleepy!! I thought I was going to collapse anytime!!)
And then, Jesus Christ’s resurrection!
Lights are turned on. Everyone celebrates. (At that point, the mood should have been energetic and full of life, but my body is not cooperating. The mind is willing but the body is weak.)
And the renewal of baptism.
(Home. I’ve to get home! Fast!!! My energy is diminishing.)

4AM Easter Sunday, St. John Parish Chapel, Infanta, Pangasinan.

Sabet-sabet. That’s how we Ilocano call the salubong.
Women following Mother Mary (initially on a black veil symbolizing her sorrow) starts procession on one side, then the men following the Risen Christ starts procession on the other side. Then the two meets at the church entrance where an angel (positioned either on a high stage or tied in a rope & suspended around 10 feet above) would remove the black veil on Mother Mary. Everyone goes inside the church. Mass starts and as everyone sings Papuri, the church bells ring signifying everyone’s joy on Jesus Christ’s resurrection.

And the Holy Week ends with a bang!
At Easter Sunday, we celebrated by going to “our” beach. We live in a coastal area. Instead of going someplace else, we instead just went swimming on the beach just around 20meters northwest of our home. It was a blast! The kids obviously enjoyed it. At early morning, there were some divers collecting sea urchins and of course the usual fishermen tending their boats. Being one with the sea on an Easter feels like being closer to God. At the book of Genesis we learn that, He created light first, and then the sea below, then the sky above…

The alpha and the omega.
Just like the life of Jesus Christ we reminisce and observe during holy week.

The start and the end.

I started this entry hoping to document my holy week. What I learned and what I experienced.
I now end this entry hoping that the teachings I learned this Holy week will remain with me forever.

The 2010 Valentine’s Trip at Iba’t Iba Pang Mga Kaek-ekan Sa Buhay Ko

2010-03-18T16:19:00.003+09:00

February 13, 2010- I woke up real early, 3AM to be exact and asked Papa to drive me to the Sta. Cruz bus terminal. The bus was set to go to Olongapo at 4AM. I personally love travelling at dawn and early mornings. The cool temperature at that time makes it more comfortable to sleep on an ordinary bus.
At 8AM, I arrived at Olongapo terminal, and as usual, as I expected, I still have to wait for my BF, he’s coming from Malabon. He arrived at 9AM and we ate breakfast at Chowking.
As we crossed the road to ride the jeepney going to the SBMA main gate, an annoyed traffic enforcer commented, “Parang asa Luneta lang kayo ha, di nyo ba nakita naka-STOP pa!”. We did not see it. Honest.
At the SBMA main gate, we negotiated with taxi drivers for our fare to Ocean Adventure. I tell you, it wasn’t cheap. One way costs PHP400.00! I asked Manong Driver if PHP350.00 is okay, anyway, we’ll also ask him to pick us up back to the bus terminal. He agreed half way. Meaning, PHP350 to Ocean Adventure, PHP400 to the bus terminal (because it’s traffic.) We agreed to the price. And somehow it’s worth the bucks because Manong Driver transformed to Manong TOUR GUIDE and Manong PHOTOGRAPHER as required to him by the ensuing events of that day.

10 AM.
Ocean Adventure is a theme park that gives shows on sea lions, whale and dolphins, the Walk on the Wild Side show with Forest survival strategies by an Aeta lecturer, a seaside aquarium and they also give lectures on the sea creatures w/c they train to perform for their shows.
The area of Ocean Adventure is relatively small. They have 4 small stadiums for the different shows they held. They also have a cafeteria inside which offers foods which is somehow pricey, but of course it is not fastfood.
The shows are great and you will really appreciate it if you are an ani,al lover like us. The view of the Subic Bay is even better!
According to my BF who was the sponsor of that trip, the total expenses was about PHP3000. Not bad for a day tour. That’s all IN, breakfast, lunch, dinner, tickets at Ocean Adventure and taxi fare.

At 5PM, Manong Driver picked us up, but before our trip back to the bus terminal, he suggested if we want to stop-by another area and take pictures of Subic Bay which we of course readily agreed to! Libre naman eh. Why not?
At 6PM, we arrived at Olongapo town proper, my BF had an upset stomach so we stopped by Jollibee para maki-cr. KAPALMUKS!
At 7PM we parted ways. He went home to Malabon. I went home to Cato.
This trip we have every Valentine’s had become our tradition.

KA-EKEKAN?!
I have currently 2 job applications and I WISH I’LL HAVE A JOB SOON!!!
MAMA got her leave credits amounting I guess to around PHP300K ++, that’s after 35 years of service for the Philippine government. I think she is still expecting for more. Di pa nabayaran lahat.
For me it is very inspiring! She used the money to build her long-time dream… Concreting of our fence! And now that it is finished, MAMA is very very happy. Dream come true indeed. The lesson here is that: ANG MAY TYAGA, MAY NILAGA!

YEAR 2009: Report of MY LIFE

2010-01-18T12:41:00.001+09:00

Last year was not a good year for the global economy. The recession made a lot of people unemployed.
Me included.
The following had been the flow of my 2009...
January to March
-BORED. I had been working in an engineering firm I do not like. I just feel like an outsider and I do not see myself growing in that company. The moment I entered, I had been thinking of leaving! Luckily, I had been involved in a project and my superior seems satisfied with my work.
March 31-
END OF CONTRACT. Whew. A lot of their prospective projects did not push through. I had anticipated that. So no bad feelings from me.
(That was not the case however for the other contractual employees, which is quite a lot, and who are eventually, by July of the same year, was laid off by the company leaving only the regular employees behind.)
April to May 27-
VACATION!! Yey! This was the time I realized what I had been missing.
Happiness is priceless. You actually do not need money to achieve it.
I packed my things and left the city, went back to my province and hibernated.
To me hibernation means no work. No socializing. Watch TV. Finish the PC games my bf gave me. Read books. Eat and sleep.
Yeah. This was the time I was the most unproductive person in the world. My parents tolerated me. I still have money then and they still treat me as a "guest".
By the second week of May however, summer was already over. This is so unexpected but all the signs that the rainy season was starting were there.
This fact alarmed me. This is climate change.
Staying in the province by this time made me observe the changes in the speed of wind and the volume of water whenever it rains. A normal rain nowadays carry wind and water as if there is a signal no. 1 typhoon. Being in a coastal community, I could hear the wind howling, the waves strike against forcefully to the sea walls in a rainy & windy night. I tell you, if you have experienced a super typhoon, you will never consider those sounds as lullaby.
May 28- Aug 28
WORK?!
I was back again in the city. I hate the job. I hate the company!
It had an HR/Finance Manager who does not know anything about the principles of structural engineering and our job in particular, and had the guts to treat us as if we are laborers in a construction yard after we had spent OTs without meal allowance, burning our brain cells just to finish the design of thousands of steel connection joints and check those rims of A3 sheets of fabrication drawings, sacrificing our time with our families just to work and meet the project deadline which may I note had been set AMBITIOUSLY by them,
considering that they won't be the one preparing the deliverable since they were up high and the ones doing that, are US, who were way below the corporate ladder. Letse sila! I did not study 5 years of Civil Engineering for them! It is not as if they pay me as much as my previous employers!
The nerve!
I only worked for that company because my bf was there. That is my karma for settling for what is available. I should really work for what I want.
Anyway, I resigned after 3 months. Thank GOD.
I don't want to be miserable forever!
Aug 29-December
VACATION AGAIN!!!!
I so love my life.
Aug-October are the months when most of the typhoons came and I just waited and watch them pass by wishing that someday I could reinforce/renovate our family house so it would be ready for such disasters and that we all could be more prepared.
I realized then that life is short. With typhoons Pepeng and Ondoy no one is safe. It does not choose its victim whether it be rich or poor.
Only GOD can save us.
Only our prayers can protect us.
I had been productive by November since my parents had this month to renovate some part of our house since my sister who works in Europe would be coming home. I was the one in charge of food/snack preparation for our workers.
I am most productive on December.
Dec 12 -Together with my sisters and my bf, we went to Enchanted Kingdom. Excluding my elder sister, it
was all our first time. (Wala kami ginawa dun kundi pumila! Note to self, DO NOT GO TO AMUSEMENT PARKS DURING WEEKENDS!)
Dec 23- My 1st ever public speaking engagement was a SUCCESS!! It was like my recital since most of my
relatives went to watch. Even the wife of our Mayor (who normally do not come on such events) was present so she could watch me. (At least she was satisfied. ATA. HEHE.) I got a lot of praise from public officials after my speech but the real star of that night was my father. This was what was said of him, "Ang swerte swerte mo naman pala talaga sa mga anak mo!" Wagi si Papa! HEHE.
Dec 26-28 BOHOL TRIP courtesy of my sister who works abroad. Note for those who are visiting Bohol... DO NOT STAY AT BOHOL BEACH CLUB IF YOU WANT A CORDIAL, WARM and PROMPT SERVICE. Sadly, they do not have it there. The view there is great though. But honestly, it is not worth the price.

There... my 2009 in a flash.
Right now I am still currently on vacation.
I was hoping I'd be back to work by February..but right now... we'll see.

My wishes and expectations for 2010?
- wedding of my eldest sister
- a kind, loving and God fearing boyfriend for my elder sister who will love her just the way she is
- a job I love doing that pays really well
- good health for my parents (and also my bf's parents)
- more savings and cash-ins for me & my bf
- more profitable investments
- and in general for me and loved ones to all be healthy and happy.

That is just about what I can say.
Farewell 2009... Cheers 2010!
Good things come if you believe because GOD loves us.

Lokal Scene

2009-09-08T11:01:00.003+09:00

It's been a while since my last entry. A lot has happened in my life since then. I had already got into and then resigned after three months in a company. Why so sudden? Because, I guess I do not have the virtues needed for the job. It was a company owned by an American with its main operational office located here in the Philippines and managed by Pinoys. Ang nakakalungkot sa kumpanya na yun, hindi sila marunong mag-alaga ng empleyado nila, naturingan pa namang kababayan natin yung asa taas. Dito kasi sa Pinas, hanggang ngayon, buhay na buhay pa rin yung "amo ako, alipin ka lang" na paguugali. Sa tagal ng pagsakop ng Kastila sa atin, me mga tao na dahil sa taas sila, parang nabigyan na sila ng karapatan na ipamukha sa mas mababa sa kanila na, "basura lang kayo. Pwede namin kayo palitan kahit kelan." And that's the culture I could not grow with. I was not happy with them and so I left, with health reasons as my main alibi. However, I told my manager the real reason behind my resignation believing that my honesty will serve its best purpose. That is, for him to do the right actions so they could adopt a better way in running their organization. So instead of them to demoralize their overstressed and overwork employees, they would encourage them and appreciate their efforts. Simple lang naman mensahe ko eh.
That chapter is of course closed already. It had opened my eyes to the unfairness of Pinoy employers. I do not want to generalize but if that is the culture of local companies, well, I am not wondering anymore why we are in the third world. Siempre di ko naman nilalahat. Most of the top local companies I think are fair to their employees. Kaya siguro sila asa top. At etong mas nakakaraming local companies na hindi makatao sa mga tauhan nila eh di napapasama sa A-list eh malamang dahil mga buwaya at matapobre yung mga nagpapatakbo sa kanila. Parang di sila aware na ang main asset ng company ay yung loyal na tauhan. At never na magiging loyal ang tao mo sa yo kung di maganda ang trato mo dito. Tama?

basta ang mahalaga masaya ka

2009-06-03T20:57:00.009+09:00

hindi na mahalaga yung poor ka... (kasi di binigay yung presyo ko)
hindi na mahalaga na hindi sosyaling lugar ang napuntahan ko..
ang mahalaga masaya ako.... minsan iniisip ko, tama ba yung decision ko.
Did I decide right when I followed my heart?

But whenever I think of the privileges this new job gives me...
-that I could go home every weekend to spend quality time with my family
-that I get to see my bf more often
-that I get paid learning new things
-that I sometimes still get paid doing nothing

I guess, I should bear with the fact that I could just save like 2000 a month... and that means I won't be rich soon..
And the fact that it's not a prestigious engineering firm.

Really.
The important thing is that I am happy.

Where I Come From..

2009-05-25T11:06:00.005+09:00

An entry inspired by Bob Ong's Bakit Baliktad Magbasa ng Libro Ang Mga Pilipino?

Katatapos ko lang basahin kaya inspired pa ako.. He he.
Isa etong aklat na sadyang ginawa para sa mga Pinoy na ikinahihiya yung lahi nila. Samakatwid, nababagay sya sa mga taong grabe ang colonial mentality. (Tulad na lang nung boypren ko na kini-claim na si Obama ang Presidente nya at mas feel mag-tuxedo kesa magbarong. Belat sa yo bf. Pasalamat ka at mahal kita. ^_^)
Where I come from… Ganito lagi ang umpisa ng mga tao na mahilig magkumpara (o magyabang)…
Wala akong colonial mentality kaya naman bow ako ke Bob Ong sa posisyon nya na itaas ang bandila ng Pilipinas sa kapwa natin Pinoy na nakaranas lang ng sarap ng buhay mula sa ibang bansa eh nakalimot na kung anong kulay ng balat nila.
Mga kababayan ko, kahit anong gawin nyong pagkalimot sa pinanggalingan nyo, hindi nyo iyan maipagkakaila kahit san kayo magpunta.

Mahal ko ang Pilipinas.
Totoo.. gusto ko magtrabaho sa ibang bansa pero dahil lang yun sa napakalaki ng diperensya ng sasahurin ko dun kumpara sa sasahurin ko dito. Yun lang yun. Gusto ko magpunta ng Australia dati (nung wala pa akong bf) dahil andun yung breed ng aso na gusto ko. Akala ko nun single for life ako eh kaya napagdesisyunan kong mag-alaga na lang ng aso para di naman super boring ng life ko. Pero iba plano ni God sa akin… January, 2007.. ipinagdasal ko na magka-bf lang ako eh hindi na ako aalis ng bansa! Tumalab ke Papa God yung hinaing ko kaya binigyan nya ako ng bf nung September nung year din na yun! Hindi ganun kadali tanggapin na hindi na ako lalabas ng bansa kaya maya't maya ko tinatakot si bf na magbibreak na kami at lalayas na ako ng Pinas. Milyong beses ko na ata yun sinabi sa kanya na di naman nagkakatotoo kaya tinanggap ko na rin sa sarili ko na dito na talaga ako. Kesehodang di yumaman. Masaya naman.
Sabi nung Hapon kong bossing dun sa first job ko… "You Flipinos have an American dream!".. Kasi daw lahat ay me pangarap mag-US. Di ko naman sya masisisi kung ganun tingin nya. But I told him.. "NOT ME! I have Japanese dream." Bwaaaaah. Pangarap ko lang magpunta ng Japan nung panahon na yun na natupad ko naman. I learned a lot from my overseas assignment. Dun mo matatanto kung gaano ka ka-Pinoy.
When you go to a first world country like Japan, you will be able to compare it from our very own third world country, the Philippines. The main difference is on the citizen's attitude. Japanese people are in general, very disciplined. Ang Pinoy sa ibang bansa eh disiplinado pero ang Pinoy na nasa Pinas ay hindi. Baket ganun? Kasi naman, dito, nangunguna pa ang mga dapat magpatupad ng batas sa paglabag nito. Me mga mangangatwiran kahit alam na ngang mali yung gawi nila. Norm na nga ata ng tipikal na Pinoy yung paglabag sa batas eh. Sus.
Katulad dito sa bahay namin. Alam na ngang bawal magsiga ng basura eh ang tigas pa rin ng ulo at mangangatwiran na nauna pa nga daw yung kapitbahay. Ang tagal din bago magets yung paghihiwalay ng bulok na basura sa hindi nabubulok. Yung compost pit, hindi na mukang compost pit kundi muka lang tipikal na basurahan. Gumawa ako ng wilting area para sana yung mga dahon at damo eh dun na pabulukin at hindi na isama sa trak ng basura kasi pandagdag ng volume ng basura yun eh di pa rin ginamit. Isinako pa rin yung laman nun at ipinahakot sa trak. Grrrrrrrr.
Sabi nga, "You can't teach old dogs new tricks."
Sa panahon ng global warming dapat sana lahat eh ginagawa yung parte sa pag-aalaga ng Planet Earth.

Me movement ngayon eh.. AKOMISMO.
Maganda sana kung lahat eh kabilang dyan.
Eto ang mga linya ko dyan eh..
Ako mismo ang magtatapon ng basura ko sa tamang basurahan.
Ako mismo ang magtuturo sa mga bata na magmano sa nakakatanda, magpahalaga sa kulturang Pinoy at edukasyon, at sumunod sa batas.
Sa atin magsisimula ang pagbabago. At wag natin kalimutan na me obligasyon tayo sa nakababatang henerasyon. Sa ngayon, tinuturo ko sa mga nakababata yung pagrespeto sa nakakatanda at pagtuturo sa kanila ng kahalagahan ng edukasyon at pagiging masipag. Bilang nakakatanda, magsilbi tayong modelo sa mga bata. At sana naman wag nating palakihin na mas matatas pa mag-English ang bagets kesa sa pagtatagalog. Gusto ba natin na maging Nation of Call Center Agents? Yun po ba ang pangarap natin sa Pilipinas kaya pinapalaki nating mahusay sa English ang bata kahit yung mga magulang eh Barok English naman kung magsalita?
Pathetic. Forever na lang ba tayong walang identity? Pangarap na lang ba natin maging Brown American?
Kung kaya nating gawing multi-lingual ang mga bagets eh iyon po ang gawin natin! Basta ako, yung mga magiging anak ko, kaya makipagusap sa Tagalog, English at Ilocano! Uray laok-laok!!

Kung me makakausap akong foreigner, eto ang ikukwento ko sa kanya…
"Where I come from, the air is fresh, the surroundings are clean and each home has a happy family. We love talking and laughing. We are friends with our neighbours. The kids respect the elders and we value our morals. We don't earn much but the most important thing is that we're happy. We put God in our midst and taking care of our family is our top priority.
Each parent would say education is important. The only inheritance they could give to their child that no one could take away. Our parents will work hard just so we'll have that education, some even will have to leave their family and work overseas where they sometimes get discriminated. Despite that, a Pinoy will always have something to laugh about..
We are a happy, family oriented and God-centered nation.
Those are the traits that make us true blooded Pinoy.
And that's where I come from."

Tsk, tsk…. Nakakalungkot lang dahil hindi lahat ng Pinoy eh nababagayan ng statement na yan. Ikaw kaya… Kaya mo bang ipagmalaki ang pinanggalingan mo?
Tingin ko kung me pagpapahalaga ka sa sarili mo bilang Pinoy..
Malamang kaya mo.

Becoming Miserable..

2009-05-22T08:21:00.005+09:00

Ang drama eh.
Mula nung nagbakasyon ako (dalawang buwan na mahigit ang nakakaraan), ngayon ko lang naramdaman yung bigat sa dibdib kasi pinagtatabuyan na ako dito sa bahay namin.
Sa totoo lang... ayoko sana magtrabaho sa Cubao... babalik na naman ako sa magulong buhay sa Maynila... balik polusyon na naman.
Pero ano naman mapagpipilian ko di ba?
Eh pinagtatabuyan na nga ako dito sa bahay.
Pagkatapos kong magtanim ng mga sitaw malapit sa bakod namin... Umpisahan yung vegetable at herbal garden.. Ngayon eh kung maari lang eh sipain nila ako dito.
Hindi naman ako pabigat dito. Naghuhugas ako ng pinggan... nagluluto naman ako kung minsan.. naglilinis ng bahay.. Inuutangan ko ba sila? Hindi naman ah.
Baket kaya nila ako itinataboy?

I'll be miserable again when I go back in the city. But what can I do? They probably think I'm becoming a bum. Well, at least I'm a useful bum. And mind you, I do not depend on them, even financially. I have my money. I just do not have a job.
What can I do? I still do not feel to settle on a job I do not like.
But anyways, I am the captain of my own ship, I decide where I go.
Therefore, I have the last say about my life.
May GOD guide and bless me.
AMEN.

Rainbows...

2009-04-02T08:37:00.004+09:00

this one was last march 31, tuesday...
and then yesterday, I saw again another rainbow...

In my life, rainbows usually are a sign of transition... The first rainbow I noticed was when I was on my way at my first day on my first job... the 2nd one was when I was on the plane back home from Japan... I saw a rainbow while I was up in the sky and while we were entering the Philippines...
And now... I had been seeing rainbows for two consecutive days... I am superstitious when it comes to good luck.. and for seeing rainbows twice already, I believe something really good is about to happen....
Maybe I will finally have the job that GOD wills me to have....
And so I wish...

kwento about wheels

2009-03-29T08:50:00.005+09:00

second hand lang pero orig naman yung mga parts nya. mountain bike na shock proof at ang pangalawa kong wheels.
isa lang naman ang ibig sabihin nito... adventure na naman to siempre. mula nung bagets ako at natuto ako magbike, kahit mag-isa ko lang na nagbabike, nagpunta ako kahit saan. magala na ako nun pa at nde ko kelangan ng tropa, basta me bike ako kaya ko gumala mag-isa.
at dahil dun kaya kabisado ko ang bayan ko...lahat ng street ng baranggay namin, ng bayan at hanggang sa baranggay nayom nasakop ko yun sa mga "exploration" ko nung bagets ako... ginawa ko yun nung elementary ako gamit yung single bike mula dun sa side car na ginagamit namin nung mas bata pa kami...
Nung high school ako nakalakihan ko na rin yung maliit na single na bike na yun... nag-move naman ako dun sa racer ni Papa. Eh ayus din yun kahit malaki medyo para sa akin. Me mga gears sya kaso hindi nga lang gumagana eh si Papa nagsi-seaman pa so nung nasira yung mga gears nung bike nya, wala na nag-aayos. Anyways, iyon naman ang reason kung baket hindi ako nakakapasyal sa mga matataas na lugar.
Nung nag-college ako nakabili naman si Papa ng scooter. Nahumaling naman ako dun. Medyo malayo layo na nararating ko dun... At nung Dec. 2003, last semester to bago ako mag graduate, naaksidente ako sa scooter na yun... Nadrive ko pa rin naman sya hanggang bahay pero me mga sugat sugat na ako nun.. Di rin naman serious pero mula nun di na nila ako pinasakay dun... well hanggang nag-grad ako... tapos binigay ni Papa sa pinsan ko yung scooter na yun.
Nung nagtrabaho na ako, ang pangarap ko naman eh magka-four wheels naman at makapunta ng Japan. Natupad ko yung pagpunta ng Japan pangalawang taon ko sa trabaho ko.. pagbalik ko mula Japan, nakabili naman ako ng karag-karag na tsikot which I affectionately call Bumblebee today.
Dahil sa kotse na yun kaya kami naging super close nung gitarista ko na naging bf ko naman na ngayon... Nung umuwi kami ng Tropang Kaladkarin (tropa namin ng aking ex-gitarista at current bf, with the Kuya na adviser naming dalawa that time, at ang roommate ni ex-gitarista na tinatawag nilang Balatuba) sa Pangasinan sa pinakauna at malamang ang huli rin naming road trip, muntik na kami mag final destination sa NLEX nung naaksidente kami... nasira yung gulong ni Bumblebee... umikot ikot kami sa NLEX at thank you GOD talaga dahil di kami sumalpok sa anumang sasakyan... Naayos naman yung kotse, nakauwi pa rin ng Pangasinan... at pagkabalik ng Manila.. saka naman nagtanong si ex-gitarista ng "Will you be my girl?"... Life is short nga kasi kaya we have to make the most out of it. Anyway, the rest is history.
So now.. I have my BUmblebee.. and my new mountain bike.
I always attribute wheels to adventure.
Sa akin ganun ha.. kasi magala ako. Hehe. Looking forward lang ako sa mga new adventures.... Life is short talaga kaya make the most out of it.

Land Trouble

2009-03-16T09:36:00.001+09:00

Mahirap talaga pag nagkakaproblema na sa properties.. naiistress out ang parents ko ngayon dahil dun sa property na niregalo sa Mama ko nung Ate nya tapos binenta nung asawa nung Ate nya yung buong lote para me pamfinance dun sa letseng baor nya. Sabi nung mga pinsan ko.. sana nauna na lang daw namatay yung matandang ulyanin na yun kesa sa Auntie ko. Masyadong mabaet si Auntie... I guess the reason she died in the first place was because of that husband.
Anyway... it is not the money that is important.. my Aunt actually was very excited when she gave that piece of land as a gift to my mother... Mama is hurting that my late Auntie's husband acts right now as if that never happened. It was a clear disrespect of my late Auntie's memory.
I wanted badly to curse that bastard I used to call "Uncle" to hell.... After all the help he recieved from my family, he still could afford to hurt my Mama just for the sake of money. Clearly, this is what happens when a father commits adultery and chooses to have an affair with a prostitute. It becomes like an incurable disease enabling him to trade even his very soul to the devil.
As much as I hate him... I really should just let God take care of everything. My father is taking action on this matter right now. And no matter how much tempting to curse that bastard Uncle and fervently pray that he dies soon, what I really should do is drop the hatred and keep on praying for the best.

There's a rainbow after the rain, ika nga ng Southborder.. and I had always been Little Miss Sunshine... I believe that if I keep the optimism and keep on praying, things will become brighter.

What Vacation??

2009-03-13T08:58:00.004+09:00

And I thought I have this time to relax....
I thought wrong.
Today, I have to finish the plans (complete with estimates) of the public toilet that our Parish Priest had asked me to do.. It is just a small building but my experience in engineering evolved mainly in steel structures for oil and gas industries. This project that I have right now is just not my forte. But still, I am a licensed civil engineer, and this was asked personally by the parish priest, I possibly could not say no. I have to turn to my college references with regards to plumbing and estimates, and I have to unearth the drawings we produced on my college project study.
I guess I have work to do... So I better start.

and it is Friday the 13th.... I wish GPT and I will get in at the UK job we applied to... Today the UK pound is equivalent to PHP66.93... That's motivating enough.

Officially ON VACATION

2009-03-04T08:46:00.001+09:00

Yesterday, I headed back to my hometown to have my long awaited vacation.
I had packed my stuff which are actually my accumulated junk of staying 4 years in Alabang.
This I believe is a clear change of environment
Four years of working in the city and it all ended due to the global financial crisis.
Right now my target is to find a new job overseas.
A job where I will be stocked with for at least 5 years.. I wish.
I just hope the calls will arrive soon...

Dealing with Unemployment

2009-02-21T06:36:00.007+09:00

And I thought my job was recession proof.
This coming March 31, I will be added to the number of unemployed due to the global financial crisis. I somehow predicted that it will be the case early on this year. I was even pressuring my bf, who also happens to be my colleague, to look for another job since his contract ends earlier than mine. But anyway, the shock had subsided, and right now, I have faith. I know and believe that we'll get through this.
The Netherlands thing did not push through... Maybe it is not just meant for me.
I will be updating my blog more the next days since I'll have more time in my hands. The next month, I will still get paid even if I won't go to work. It is part of my termination package. Somehow, I still consider myself lucky.
I have on-going applications on some international engineering companies right now. I am just praying that they will call soon. I just have faith. It is not like I am not doing anything. But right now, I think this is my chance to do things right. To look for my "dream job" (at least as a structural engineer). My goal is to have an identity, and that means, I intend to give my loyalty to the next company I will work with.

Post Valentine Report (Philippine Balloon Fiesta -Our Clark Adventure)
My bf and I went to Clark last Friday (Feb. 13) for the Philippine Hot Air Balloon Fiesta. Sadly, since we got there late, we were not able to take pics of the hot air balloons (to my disappointment.. but my mood went back when I saw the paragliding exhibition! ^_^)
It was a great time be outdoors. It was our first time to go to Clark, so it was also an adventure.
May I also note, that at least, my bf took effort to give me some valentine presents this year (there was the card, the cute stuffed toy, chocolates... and the whole day together). That was unexpected and so not him so I guess I have to give him that.
And... I got to meet his brothers (with their girlfriends/wife) for a family dinner at a Japanese resto in the Fort. That was progress for our relationship... I think.

So far so good... even with unemployment.. the best thing is that I am happy.
I know we will get through this.. I have faith.

"I'd rather do nothing and be happy than do something I do not love." Joy Fuller, What Happens in Vegas

Netherlands

2009-01-20T06:58:00.004+09:00

I got an email from an agent asking if I'll be interested to work there..

Prior to that, GPT and I had been thinking of transferring to another company. I know that with the global economic crisis that has been going on, everyone will probably agree that this is not the time to resign.

There was a question in agent's email that goes.. "How much is your monthly net income in euros?".. That got me to thinking and converting... and later on realizing that really... why is the difference so big? In euros, my income does not reflect that I work as a structural engineer.

I just wish something good will come out of this.

But again, if it is God's will.. then THY WILL BE DONE.

I just wanna work there with GPT... and besides that I will be closer to my sister who works in Luxembourg... that is just 4 hours drive or 1 hour by plane... I just want to go there to earn more money and experience a Dutch life... Sana.. SANA. Yan lang kaya kong gawin ngayon.. ang mangarap at magdasal..

happy new 2009!

2009-01-10T08:35:00.005+09:00

bwahahaha. delayed na tong entry ko. over.
nakakatamad naman kasi.

Anyway.. I just want to mention the highlights of my 2008..
1. That I transferred to another company (this had been my 2nd job)...
2. On my new company, we joined a Battle of the Bands competition. That had been my first time to be involved in a competition like that. I was the vocalist of our band while my bf was the bassist. We managed to be the 1st runner up with just 0.11% difference with the champion.Great job for a first timer right? Hehe.
It has been a year of adjustment for me (career-wise). Our farm (the family business) did good for 2008 inspite the fact that our town got severely hit by typhoon Cosme (May 18). Our house had its roof damaged due to that typhoon. My sister Jamy went home for Christmas and we had a blast last Dec. 25 as we celebrated the Christmas together with our relatives. My uncles and aunties (the brothers and sisters of both my Ma and Pa) are all present. That was a big deal to our parents. My sister went back to Luxembourg on Jan. 1 while all of us get back to work on Jan. 5... Another year of challenges again. With that.. we welcome 2009.

For this year, I plan to start the plans for our house renovation. My family will also focus on the improvement of our farm. I plan to buy a cow to add on our livestock.

Yun lang naman for this year. Simple lang naman ang theme ko sa 2009... at yun eh ang.... MAGPAYAMAN.
Yun lang. Hehe. Sana matupad ko. BWaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

What is a boyfriend?

2008-12-29T02:08:00.004+09:00

I really to have ask myself that. For an idealistic like me, I expect too much from my boyfriend. And now that reality sinks in. I'm wondering if I really need one.
A boyfriend is a companion. If you're used to your set of friends, once you have a bf, you get stucked with him. Your social life will revolve around him most of the time. So basically, you monopolize each other's time and attention. He should be there when you need him... but from my experience, this is not always the case. And that would be applicable with everyone around you. Even your family will not always be there to help you so it would really help you in life if you can manage alone.
A bf would usually make you happy when you are together and when you are far apart, you spend your time mostly daydreaming about him. That is so not good, so if you plan to have a long distance relationship but you've been so used to having him around most of the time, I think it would be better if you split up. You will be so paranoid most of the time and as I said, your time will just be wasted thinking of him. It would be better if you call it quits before you separate ways. That way you both will be free from each other. You're doing each other a favor by splitting up.
No matter how serious your relationship with your boyfriend is, you really can't say he is "The One" till you both have said your wedding vows and had a marriage contract. (But remember, with annulment, marriage is still not a warranty that you will live happily ever after.) You really can't say he is "The One" till the end of your forever. I guess the moment you decide that that person is HIM, that's just faith telling you that maybe it is the one you're waiting for. You still can't be 100% sure but since it is faith, you just have to trust your gut feel. Fingers crossed, you fervently hope and pray that you're right about it.

Honestly... with some of the serious showbiz couples splitting up, I'm being disillusionized with having a boyfriend. No matter how you love a person, it does not warranty that you'll end up with him. It takes two to tango. If you both can't ride on with each others TOPAK and work out your differences, the relationship won't ever work out. I've been trying to split up with my bf for a lot of times... I'm just thinking I'd be better off alone. I don't know. I thought before that if I had "The One", there would be no problems. Right now, the problems were all initiated by me. I guess I'm just sick and tired of my status. I'm like that most of the time. Even when I was single. But at least then, I only trouble myself. If I decided to sulk and hibernate people really don't care. Now, if I tell my bf.. "cool off muna tayo"... It will be super big deal to him. It hurts him big time... eh the reason I wanted to cool off is because so he'd free of me for a while. I'm such a big pain. I do not intend to hurt him. Of course I love him. It's just that.. I hate worrying. And now that we're not together... I just keep on thinking about him... and he's not always available.

Bottom line... this entry had been because I just miss my bf very much. I really can't tell if he is "The One". Only time will tell. But life is too short. I really just have to think about that. Life is too short. Period.

A Sermon To Myself

2008-11-08T20:09:00.000+09:00

Wag mong isinisisi sa iba yung pagiging failure mo. Wala sila kagagawan dun. Kung napansin ng bf mo na mataba ka, wag kang mainis. Eh yun ang totoo eh. Why would you have to be pissed off at him? Can’t you remember what he told you before? He said, “You can be a hottie if you want to….” He saw your potential amidst your really boring packaging. Appreciate that. Not all boyfriends are like that. Most are plain superficial.
Exclusivity? Charuz. Eversince issue na sa yo yan. Porke me ibang friends, nde na siya exclusive sa yo. Dahil lang dun, nanlalaglag ka na? Wala ka bang amor propio? Don’t you know your worth? Do you think they could actually replace you? You are unique. And whatever you do could not be duplicated by anybody. They are exclusively yours no matter who they associate with because whatever it is between you will be way different even if they do the same thing with somebody else.
Please don’t make your moods depend on how people reacts to you. You can’t please everybody. But you have the power to program yourself to always feel like a winner even if you’re a losing. Remember, messing up does not mean you’re a failure, it only means you have to try again and do better next time.
You are in control of your life. That should be the case or else, others will be controlling you. And if you let that happen, that will be the end of you. So stick to your ideals, achieve your goals and just be you.
At this point in your life, it may seem like you’ve achieved a lot but believe me… you still have a long way to go.
Pray always for GOD’s guidance. If it’s not for HIM, you won’t even exist in the first place.

Break.. Broke...Broken.

2008-10-26T00:47:00.011+09:00

Patalastas lang... I changed the layout because I prefer to keep it simple. Para mabilis magload yung page. Kumuha ako ng Globe Visibility Kit kasi. Eh mabagal rin connection kaya mas okei yung simpleng blog para nga mabilis magload yung page. Wala ako kapasepasensya eh. He he. I intend to update my blog regularly from now on..

Lately, my bf and I would argue about the simplest things. Issues that came out just because none of us want to give in. We may have similarities, but fact is, we are really very different from each other. Our differences should compliment one another. It was that way before, but as I said lately, everything is just an issue.
He is my number 1 critic. He would criticize me about everything. It is already affecting my self-esteem. Being the vocalist of our band (an entry for our company's Battle of the Bands).. he would want everything to be perfect (he is our bassist, BTW). In our practices, he would point out every time I'm off-key. It is actually quite demoralizing for me. Of course, I just developed the self confidence I have now. It is just frustrating to have him criticize my every move instead of him supporting me. Fine.. criticize me.. but I just wish he does it in a nice way. Not as if he's a Simon Cowell clone.
I don't know what is happening to us, but for me enough is enough. We don't understand each other anymore. I agree with what he told me that I have a problem keeping a relationship and that's why if we break up, I'm planning of not being in a relationship again. Really.
I told him we're over. I can't take what's happening to us anymore. It causes too much emotional stress for me. We'll argue and then later we're okay again.. and then, he'll get mad at me.. I'll get too tired, my energy gets drained of trying to explain and understand what just happened and why he is mad at me all of a sudden. And then, when he cools down then I get mad at him in return. It's a never-ending cycle and it's so immature.
I wanted to break up with him. This time for good. Before, when I ask him for a break-up, it's just a threat. I don't really mean it, I just do that to test him. But with what is happening lately.. I'm getting really frustrated.
I do love him.. but this cycle should stop.
It's not like were in high school. We're actually old enough to get married. I just wish we both act our age.
Break.. broke... broken..It was a mantra I keep repeating to myself that night I'm dead serious about breaking up. But we're still together. We are meant to be. We just have to work this out.
As they say.. together we stand.. divided we fall.

Inasthma na nga na naman sya.. it happens everytime he gets stressed.. kaya ayoko nag-aaway kami.. kaya gusto ko na rin magpakalayo-layo eh.. kasi parang ako na lang lagi ang tagadala ng stress sa kanya.. I do love GPT.. nahihirapan din ako everytime na nahihirapan sya. Pointless rin talaga away namin. Away bata. Pambihira. Eh antatanda na namin!

I Promise

2008-09-09T21:11:00.004+09:00

It's a big word. PROMISE. For my type of person, a promise is made to be broken. I have a big problem keeping my word. But still, as long as we live there is hope, so I could not say I am hopeless. Because maybe if I just be more serious with every word I utter, I guess that will be the time I'll finally have a direction.

I am not going overseas. I mean, I really have to get real. It is as if I can leave GPT. I can't. Of course we'll probably manage being far from each other. But, really, I should be contented that this is where GOD wants me to be. I think it is HIS will that I stay here. In any case, I'm quite talented. I'll probably make it big if I just put my mind to it.

And so.. I promise:
1. Not to envy those who are overseas. They have money. And that's all they have. I have the joy of being with my family anytime I want. The talks with Mama, visiting the farm and watching cable TV with Papa, all those moments with GPT.. I have those. And that is priceless.
2. that I will make it BIG! Pinas is not hopeless. That's just attitude of Pinoys and I will be not like that!
3. that I will be happy with what I have. GOD had blessed me.

Basta. I have a bright future ahead. And it will be a future set here in RP! May GOD bless me.

OMG

2008-07-08T20:59:00.003+09:00

Diosko. Inabot na ng syam-syam mula nung last entry ko. Buti na lang at nagawan ko ng paraan ang magkainternet ako dito sa bahay ng hindi ko kelangan mag-subscribe at magpalinya. Ginamit ko yung smart internet ng phone ko. Mabagal nga lang connection. 10pesos per 30 seconds.. Suma tutal pede na rin pagtyagaan.
Marami na nangyari mula nung last entry ko. Binagyo kami ng Gading at nasira bubong namin. Sobrang bad trip ako sa trabaho di ilang beses na akong nagisip mag-resign.. Me kaaway ako sa top ranks ng department namin... Nag-aaway at nagtatalo pa rin kami ng bf ko pero masaya naman kami madalas. Masyado na ata kaming nasasanay sa isa't isa kaya tipong kaya na namin magbasa ng naiisip ng isa't isa.
Me banda na ako at sasama kami sa Battle of the Bands sa November within our company lang naman...
Ayun.. marami ako kelangang i-post.
Ang naiisip ko para lang mas maximized gamit ko dito sa ganitong klaseng internet eh, sulatin ko muna sa WORD yung entry ko para pag nagconnect ng internet eh icocopy ko na lang. Parang mas maganda ata yung ganun.
Hmm. Antok na rin ako.
Hanggang sa susunod na kabanata.

it's been a while

2008-05-11T12:59:00.003+09:00

O di ba. Parang isang dekada na ang nakalipas mula nung last entry ko. HAHA.
I had been busy with my training at my new company. How do I find the new place? Honestly, I don't think I'm gonna stay there long. Hahaha. Considering that I've messed up most of the activities in the training. Oh, yeah, I think I just blew it. I've just given them the worst impression of me! Mwahahaha. Not that I mind though. But then, come what may, I just have to accept the inevitable. Anyway, my life is what I made it.
We had our company outing/team building last friday at Laiya Batangas. Funny. Being in a new company where I share my first name with 2 others, they had decided to baptized me with a nickname I hated since I was a kid. Now I have to tolerate people calling me "JOY". Darn! I always hated it when people call me that!
I told you. I probably won't stay there long. But anyway, while I'm there, I'll just have to do my best.

That's what I promised GOD anyway. I just have to forget what I did before and start again.
As always, I should offer everything for GOD's glory.

Anyway, I really believe that there's a reason behind everything.

happy ^-^

2008-04-01T07:44:00.005+09:00

i have a new job with a much better compensation and i should say, looks very much promising. (Yeah. I could stay in the Philippines if this works out.)
i get to see my bf more often...
i'd be able to go home to the province every other week to see my family..
i still don't have money but i have enough right now.. and more when my final pay comes.. and when i'll receive my 1st salary at my new job...

so far... so good.

However..
I'll be cutting off unnecessary expenses.
Like my broadband subscription, gym, my car, (I am letting my father have it. Haha!) and I'll just have to keep one credit card (I used to have four. Hehe.)
There. Bagong buhay na ako. Someday I might be able to afford a condo and a Honda CRV. Magtitipid muna ako ngayon. HAHA.
But I'm keeping my apartment. Hanap na lang ako ng housemate. I like it here. No pollution. Friendly and helpful neighbors.. Saka na lang nga ako lipat..
Hmm.. there.
Yesterday was my 1st day at my new job.

This is definitely is a new start.
And I intend to do it right this time.

It's just a treat that I get to see the one I love everyday. Haha. (Kilig!)
Hmmm. O Sya.

GOD does takes care of me.
And for that, I feel really blessed.

Interview for my 2nd Job Today!!

2008-03-24T11:01:00.003+09:00

I'll blog about my vacation later. I need to prepare for my job interview after this.
How am I feeling?
I'm happy of course. I received the call last Wednesday and I'd have to say I'm more relieved than excited about it. The excitement will probably come when I had learn how much they will be paying me. Haha.
I'll give an update later. For now, I gotta go and prepare.
Wish me luck. Fingers crossed I wish they'll give me at least twice of what I am receiving in my previous company. I wish, I wish. (Please Lord, let it be like that. AMEN.)

Charmed by Facebook

2008-03-18T03:50:00.005+09:00

I'm still awake at 3AM. That is so not good.
I tried joining Facebook. Of course, I've been hearing about it before, but knowing myself, I don't usually go with the trend. However, I got hooked minutes after joining.
I guess creating an account at Facebook for me is very timely. Its like marking my transition in my career and my life in general.
Compared with Friendster which is so full of garbage nowadays, Facebook is a like a breeze of fresh air. Of course it still depends on the owner. For people like me who craves simplicity and convenience, I do away with applications that are useless. They just make navigation in your page very slow. And having a laptop like the one I have, that kind of page will definitely test my patience.
With Facebook, inviting people in events, advertising anything and updating your profile all becomes really simple. It even shows a thread of your latest activity in it.
I really like the simplicity of Facebook. It makes navigation faster. Besides that, there's a feeling of being one community in it. Your true name is even published there.
Friendster sells cheap compared to Facebook. Friendster is very superficial in that your primary picture there is always a big deal, there's also a counter of how many people have checked your profile and that I think is very shallow.
In conclusion, Facebook promotes community while Friendster promotes popularity.
Have I made it obvious which one I preferred?
Point given. Now, I rest my case.

scattered thoughts on a saturday morning

2008-03-14T21:20:00.017+09:00

I really like Jason Castro in American Idol.
I only got to see that show ONCE but Jason already made an impression on me. His style and the way he carries himself just stands out from the rest. When others are just performers I see in him a real artist. This is just my personal opinion and I believe the others are probably better than him in other aspects, yet Jason Castro already has my vote. I do not know what will happen to him throughout the contest but even after American Idol, I believe Jason Castro has what it takes to make it to the music industry.

I wanted to have a baby. As cute as the kid shown here. I'm turning 25 this year and somehow I wish I have enough money so I could afford to be a single mom. Yeah right! Oh well, I really wish I'd have a baby as cute as this guy here. A lot of people had been telling me, when you plan to start your family at the age of like 30 or older, they say it's difficult already to bond with your kids. Imagine when you're 40 your eldest is just 10 years old. Yes, of course in reality no matter how big your generation gap is, your role as a parent does not change. But thinking about it right now, yeah, I think I see their point. The point is when your son/daughter turns 18 and you're 50, I believe it would be very difficult for you to relate to what your son/daughter is going through. That is generation gap and is oftentimes overlooked by would-be parents. But I guess that is different when you have cool parents like the one I have. They're open minded about everything plus they are very accepting (I guess that comes from the fact that they trust me.) Imagine when you had your baby at 40. Gosh! You'd probably look like a grand parent to your child. That's tragic.

I still do not have a direction. Yeah, I've changed my outlook but time for me is running out. I only have 2 weeks in my current company and then I've got nothing to do after that. I really should do something, and WAITING is not one of them! I'll start looking for other jobs starting today. The one I've currently applied to is the only one who could keep me in this country for now but I'm getting impatient so the next option would have to be overseas.

If GOD wills it... Somehow, I'm getting used to the idea of staying here in the country. But as I said, looking at the course of events, I really should not count on it. I like it here better. I don't watch TV so I don't get affected with the political drama. Personally, I'm happier here. Although of course, I know I'll cope no matter where I go. I have survival instincts. (Sigh.) But for now, I have to start looking at my other options. I only got 2 weeks left. At least I know where to go next.

Changing My Outlook

2008-03-13T06:56:00.005+09:00

Okay, I admit. I tend to be over-acting at times. It is how I release my frustration with my life. In reality, I do not get violent or something to that effect to stress my point that life is unfair.. yada, yada, yada.
I really have a cheerful disposition. Being over-acting, writing blogs that seems like my last entry before I commit suicide and telling everybody that I'm hopeless is just my way of coping through these "unfair" situations in my life. But really, when I do that, there is no ounce of seriousness to it. I mean.. leave that to others who really are serious with life. I love joking around frustrating other people with this negative outlook, making them believe I'm really hopeless but really, do not worry about me because I have no intention to self-destruct.
I love my life too much to do that.
I know I still have a lot of things to do and although it may seem like I'm a real selfish person (always me, me, me -that resulting from the fact that I'm the youngest in my family, I've been used to getting what I want), in reality, I just want to achieve things so I could serve GOD more.
Yes, right now, I am in the middle of nowhere. At this point I do not know what the future holds. But I keep forgetting that I have faith. I may be stripped off with everything I have achieved but my faith should always keep me going.
I believe things will be brighter. GOD had always been there for me. I am a disciple. A follower. What GOD wills, it is where I should go. Lately, I've been lost thinking that my life is about achieving things for myself. Wrong. I should live my life doing everything for GOD's glory.
I have no fear of what the future holds because I know that whatever it is. I'm ready for it. I have faith. That's all that matters.

Fucked Up and Wasted!

2008-03-08T11:21:00.004+09:00

That's how I describe my life right now.
I used to be a successful young engineer. Now, I'm a nobody.
I have no money. My car has a flat wheel and I decided to leave it parked close to the building of the company I'll be leaving at the end of this month. I only got 30 pesos left in my coin purse. I'm running out of food and I'm running out of water. I have colds. I don't know if I'd still be paid by my salary this coming 10th or they'll withheld it till my final pay which I should expect not later than April 30.
I'm at loss. I guess I just have to kill myself after this entry.

I used to be rich. But I did not believe in safekeeping money for emergency purposes. I told myself I have friends, I can turn to them when something like what's happening right now happens. However, I've got such a big pride, I'd rather die than ask them for money. And so goes my suffering.

Why is that when you lend somebody money, it's such a big deal when you'll ask that person to give it back to you. And giving back the money seems like a big favor to you by that person considering that that money you are asking him/her to give back is yours in the first place. Next time I let people borrow my money, I'd rather consider that given and forget about it than expect that person to give it back to me without so much fuss. Now, when you asked them for your money, they always have alibi and things like that. It is really very disappointing. Things like this gets one disillusioned in generosity.

Okay...
I know GOD provides.
I really should not worry too much.
But this is the last time I'll experience this. I swear. Really. I'll make sure of that!

Nursing a Flu and a Broken Heart

2008-03-06T17:01:00.005+09:00

Okay..
I'll cut the crap and the dramatics.
But right now, I'm really in a foul mood. I'll probably self-destruct if I'm able to concentrate on how to go about it.
I'm really sad right now.
I'm at my lowest point.
I don't have money.
I feel fat and ugly! And I plainly just don't feel well!!!
O....M.....G!
I'm wasted. My life's messed up real bad.
Darn it! I soooo hate it when life's like this!

a girlfriend's thought

2008-03-01T23:20:00.007+09:00

To those who can't relate... Do forgive me for this entry. ^-^
Lately, my boyfriend developed a goal he tries REALLY hard to fulfill.
He should make me laugh everyday.
He got attracted to me because of my cheerful disposition and positive outlook in life. When we we're still "tropa", I easily blended with his set of friends because we are a bunch of easy-going, fun-loving people who loves to talk and joke about anything under the sun. My boyfriend (who is just a friend back then) however is the silent type whose role in every "joking" match by his friends is to laugh and listen. When he cracks a joke.. it's always CORNY.
However things had changed a lot since we got associated with each other.
He is such a private guy who retreats to his "solitary shell" once in a while. But being his girlfriend, he gave me the right to invade it. There, he becomes spontaneous even wacky at times. When he is with me, he is not self-conscious. And I delight to that realization. We might be compatible about some things but when it comes to personality he is my exact opposite. He cares about how other people will see him while I just don't have a care in the world.
Even with corny jokes, amazingly, he does manage to make me laugh everyday.
His joke delivery has still got to improve but I credit the laughter to his "newfound" spontaneity. Some things he unconsciously does are just plain hilarious.
Well, as they say, give credit where credit is due.
Indeed, it is such a treat to have a boyfriend who delights hearing his girlfriend's laughter knowing for a fact that it was him who caused it.

it all ends today

2008-02-29T07:20:00.003+09:00

I will be giving my resignation letter today. It just feels so good. I'm free!
I have nothing against my company. It was my choice to leave. I feel like this is just the right thing to do. I'm not involve in any project. I was not transferred to any project (because they don't expect any project till June). I think this is just the perfect time to leave.
There is no need for me to delegate my job because technically I am idle right now. Aside from training, I got nothing else to do.
Well, I'm in-charge with our department's newsletter.. which I plan to deliver before I leave. Too bad, I'm the only person who has the drive to devote time to it, but what the heck, I'm leaving. I did my part. I started that newsletter! I just pray someone will take over.

Where am I going?

Honestly... I don't know yet. GOD will probably have something in-store for me. My subconscious tells me I've got nothing to worry about. That, I still have to see.. For now, I'll relish this feeling.

Freedom.. (Breathe in...... Breathe out..)

At least I'll have a month to act as my own boss. (Haha!) I so love my life.

career vs lovelife

2008-01-12T23:07:00.000+09:00

If I I choose career, I'll have very limited quality time with my boyfriend. I'll leave him here in the Philippines and pursue my career in Australia. That was my original plan last year. I actually looked forward to that.. so what the heck.. I did not care about my performance because I'm leaving... And then.. late 2007.. I acquired a boyfriend... so unexpected.. so spontaneous yet very life changing.. He will be very sad if I leave to Australia.. so I gotta chose.
I'm still here...
Still at my old place alone.. my roommate had gone to Japan for another overseas assignment.. and if asked if I'd want an overseas assignment right now... I'd say.. "no thanks".. I really can't leave.. what is the purpose of not pushing through my plan of going to Australia when I'd accept an overseas assignment instead?
I chose to be with him...
He transferred closer... His family was teasing him that his only reason of transferring to Alabang is me... but that's not true. He's an engineer who is very dissatisfied with his company... with his job..et.al. I can't bear him being like that. Always stressed out and very problematic.. really plain negative...
When before he was a subcon employee.. now he is a competitor.
That's what I call development.

Career vs Lovelife?
My career is okay.. I just have to do my part.. deliver my outputs with quality and according to schedule. Sure, I should be earning more outside the country. But, that dream is still there.. for now.. I'll try my best to balance both. I'm glad that he'll be moving closer this February.. lesser worries for both of us.. at least we love our job.. and our companies could sustain all our needs.
My lovelife.. it's something I did not expect to have.. but having someone I know will be me till we grow old.. we really have to work out everything this early..
Going to Australia may not happen soon.. but the important thing is.. I won't be going there alone.

the year that was..

2008-01-06T22:31:00.000+09:00

An overview of 2007.. the highlights of course would be..
1. I bought my first car ever! (1992 Fiat Uno) That was February.
2. We moved out from the company dorm.. February also. The start of my independent life! I started paying the bills. That would be the house rent, internet and utilities.
3. My first gig at the 10th floor for our company's anniversary. I am the vocalist and played rhythm guitar. That happened on September.
4. On that same month was the first major road trip of Tropang Kaladkarin. I drove Bumblebee from Manila to Infanta! Alright.
5. And of course.. after that road trip.. back in Manila.. my guitarist asked me to be his girl... and that happened inside Bumblebee.. Now you know why that car is very important to me!

I've been too busy carrying out my new status ever since and so my reason why I have not updated this blog regularly.
We're still happy though we fight sometimes and that is unavoidable.. Still, our relationship is growing stronger. We are working out our differences.. and so far so good.. At least I am sure that he's the one "GOD made for me".
My plan of going to Australia won't push through this year. Probably 2010 since I have to wait for him.

Th year that was... 2007 definitely is a year of firsts for me... The best thing that happened of course is that I found him.. the one I've waited for so long... who would have thought we'd end up together... really.. if it's meant to be, then it's meant to be.

Cheers to the new year 2008! I expect a lot of good things this year. The fact that I stayed when I should be busy planning my leaving for Australia... well.. that I gotta accept. Besides if it s God's will that I go there, I'd probably be going there with him...

2 Months After..

2007-11-17T12:51:00.000+09:00

2 months ago, same date, nsa loob tau ni bumblebee and i askd u to b my grl. U sed, "il think about it", but not more than a second binawi mo and said, "cge na nga".. Hehe. Kilig2x pa tau nun kc 1st tym 2 exchange i love you's to each adr. Bsta. Point q is im glad iv met you, Happy 2nd monthsary. I luv u. Gudam

He texted me that at 2am today. I woke up with my Nokia 3310's text alarm (I used that unit for my SUN sim), and that message just touched me. I actually cried. And remembering all our problems (especially with his family), I prayed.. looking at the night sky from my room's window.. I prayed.. "Lord, please bless our relationship." It has been 2 months... then, I replied to his text message.... with tears (haha. emote! Drama namin ni boyfriend.)

Uy, ang sweet, natouch ako suuuuper. U just mde my day. Maybe rough road ahead bt as long as we luv each adr we'l carry on. I love you vry mch. Hapi 2nd monthsary.

2 months.. I bet other couples did not went through those hardships in two months... conflicts that serious happens when you're planning to settle down.. but not when you just have a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship that is only 2 months old! It is quite remarkable that the conflicts just makes our relationship stronger. It made us more mature.

Dami pa namin kelangan ayusin ni boyfriend... every month we have to celebrate that we're still together.. despite the problems.. despite the differences.. kami pa rin.. and we still love each other. With the rate we are going the 1st anniversary will have to be a big celebration. To think we're just boyfriend-girlfriend... we're not yet married! (At matagal pa yun mangyayari!! Utang na loob. Enjoy muna sa singlehood noh!)

If this is how GOD tests us for that real serious role far far ahead.. we'll at least I'm confident to say we're passing it... with high colors... (modesty aside.hehe)

Conflicts

2007-11-11T07:08:00.000+09:00

I've always believed that when something is meant for you, there should be no conflicts.. everything falls in the right place...
I don't know.. As much as I love my boyfriend, it hurts me that I could not win the approval of his family. I have a pleasing personality and it is easy for me to be friends with anybody in an instant. This is not the case with his family. The time I became his girlfriend, his family got into a mutual decision to hate me. And that fact just hurts so badly.
I lived my life offering everything for God's glory... Sure I'm no "trophy" material (sexy and/or drop-dead gorgeous) but I am comfortable and happy with who I am. I have done my best to at least meet up wih everyone's expectations. I made myself pure, never flirted, never even got a fling and all that because I had been waiting for him. I prioritized my studies first and now my career, in short I kept myself busy while waiting for him just so I won't settle in with who's available for the taking... yes, I believed I had waited for him, my boyfriend whom I do love but whose lovedones hate my guts.
Is it because they think I'm keeping him away from them? Was I a bad influence? A flirt? Easy-girl? I believed this are the thoughts they had associated with me so far... A total slap in my face, a spit in my person and should I have a heart made of stone, could never have hurt me. But it does and it stings, and I just could not keep up with their reactions anymore. Because I am NOT what they think of me!
They did not even gave it a chance to get to know me.
I thought I could take it... But the bruise they keep on giving my ego is really too much to bear.
I said I will be waiting for him... (We should be going overseas together.)
But I've made my decision.. I'll leave next year.
He does not have to know right away of my plans but I'll let him know... in time.
This is something I have to do. For myself.. for our future.. for my family.. and for his family.
They wanted to get rid of me. I'll give them that. At least I'll keep my distance.. till they're ready to give me a chance.
Sure, I could wait.. but I'm not waiting here... I'll pursue my dreams.. yes, i would have wanted pursuing my dream with him but obviously that is out of the question. He is too sheltered and his family just does not trust him enough that they can't allow him leaving soon.. (and leaving with me? I wonder what they'll say about that.)
I've been independent all my life. Obviously I do not need him to run my life, I could do that by myself, thank you... but I DO wanted him in life.. really. It's just not happening soon.
I've found the guy I wanted to end up with. But he's not ready for the taking.
I'll be waiting for him then.. I don't mind even if I have to wait till he's 30 before they allow him to be with me (OA but true, his family is that protective of him). Meanwhile I'll keep myself busy..
I'll leave next year. He does not know this right now but I've made up my mind. If it is God's will, then all shall be done.

The 1st Month of Forever..

2007-10-20T15:25:00.000+09:00

Hmm.. having a boyfriend (after 24 years of waiting) is definitely life-changing! I mean, my usual bland existence has now got colors in it.. I'm still getting used to it.. Y'know, having a partner, not deciding alone, hearing first what he has to say before jumping into my usual impulsive decisions.. and with regards to that, now, there should be no more decisions on impulse... everything should be "negotiated" with him...

Since we got together, everyday has always been a challenge. Arriving at our first monthsary definitely marks a milestone in our relationship. The 1st week was pure bliss, the 2nd week was hell (away lagi!), we got the hang of our differences in our 3rd week.. and in the fourth week we already looked like an old couple (very comfortable with each other despite the differences!)

October 17, 2007... our first monthsary...

We left our office at 5PM to go to Intramuros. (That was our 2nd time to go there, the first was during our first week after hanging out at his home in Malabon. Nakapambahay pa nga sya nun! We just visited his alma mater-Mapua, and ate dinner at that area while he plays tour guide at nagfifiling estudyante kasi nga nakapambahay lang!)

First stop was Malate Church were his parents got married. Visit lang naman kasi hindi na namin naabutan yung novena. We got there at around 7PM. After that, on our way to my car, me nadaanan kaming mga stall na nagbebenta ng bulaklak. He bought me my first boquet of roses!! How sweet!!! As in. Parehas na first time namin. Sya sa pagbigay, ako sa pagrecieve.. Heheh. Then.. I told him.. Na isa yun sa mga hiniling kong sign ke GOD.. that "the one" will give me a dozen of red roses.. and lo & behold.. GOD truly answers prayers.. coz it was done.

After that.. diretso na kami sa Intramuros..
Dinner lang dun. Pinagtitinginan kami kasi naka-corporate kami parehas.. Heheh. Eh mga estudyante usually ang naandun. La naman espesyal sa hapunan.. Suqui's special daw yun.. parang Yang Chow (fried rice).. hmmm... yun na raw yun eh.. la na ulam. Eh parang bitin sa kin kaya humirit pa ko ng calamares..
After dinner.. lakad-lakad.. around his beloved alma mater (hehe).. balik sa kotse.. kinuha yung gitara.. akyat sa walls ng ng Intramuros.. before 9 pa yun kaya me mga naggogolf pa tapos me mga flying golf balls kaya diskumpyado sya tumambay sa walls mismo.. nung nag-lights-off sa me golf area lumipat kami dun sa me gilid..makakahilata ka kasi dun.. di nman kagandahan mag-star gazing kasi napakaliwanag sa Manila (mas okay pa nga sa me yero ng apartment namin mag-star gazing, hehe.) Ayun... tugtog sya ng gitara.. kanta ako.. kwentuhan.. eh me mga bumabagabag sa kanya that time.. we talked about how we should deal with our differences.. how to meet half-way.. ayun.. kasi, waste of time talaga pag nag-aaway kami.. hmm..
Mga 10PM napansin ko me tao sa likod namin eh.. akala ko sisitahin kami.. eh nung nakitang wholesome couple naman kami eh di na kami inistorbo..
We went home at 11PM.. Heheh.
Me mahaba pa sanang kwento.. kasi nagkatakutan kami sa kotse.. HAHA. Parehas na abnoy! Bloopers eh! Eh praning ako suuuuper.. dapat uwi sya sa staff house nila nun eh.. malapit lang naman sa apartment pero ang mangyayari mag-isa ko papasok sa village eh medyo napraning ako.. tapos the feeling is mutual.. hehe.. kasi pati sya natakot na rin bumalik ng staff house.. ayun.. natapos ang monthsary namin na overnight sya sa apartment (umuwi naman sya ng alas singko ng madaling araw, dapat alas kuatro eh pahirapang gisingin!) Ayun.. suma-total.. memorable ang month-sary.. me comic relief sa huli.. hehe.
Ayun... so much for the first month.
Sa 2nd month magkahiwalay na kami ng company.. (balik na kasi sya sa company nila, subcon kasi sya..) Ayun, for a change... hmmm... hmmm... magkalayo na kami nun! Bagong challenge uli.
Ocia.

My Love Story

2007-09-22T09:17:00.000+09:00

Who would have thought?? We're celebrating our 5th day anniv today. HAHA. I told him we have to take it one day at a time.. coz forever is a big word.. I'm still getting used to the role (girlfriend!).. but one thing I'm sure of.. I am in love! And it gets deeper as days pass by... We get to talk about how it happened.. what brought us to this point? Yeah, there was no courtship stage, but we learned to know each other better.. grabe.. mahaba talaga yung kwento.. but read on... Mahaba pa tong kwento na to.. Dami pa gagawin.. Tomorrow, I have to meet his family and he'd formally introduce me to them as his gf.... I have to tell everybody at our office where we both work, kinda hard coz I have to explain especially to people who don't have any idea that something's going on between us.. then my friends.. my family knows already and they've met him but I'll introduce him formally as a bf this 26th, since they're coming here to te city for my sister's departure to luxembourg..
Hindi ko akalaing maseremonyas pala ang pagkakaroon ng bf.. Kulang na lang i-announce ko sa buong mundo eh.. Kaya lang.. I know I have to tell everybody coz I had been single all my life.. This time, I finally found someone, and them knowing how idealistic I could get, I knew I have to testify how it all happened.. what made me decide it's him? How did I fall in love?
GOD showed me the way... and the falling just happened.. caught me off-guard and the realization was like christmas morning (there was a gift under the christmas tree waiting to be opened.. parang ganun yung feeling.)
We do not know what the future holds... hmmm.. one day at a time nga drama eh... bahala na si Lord sa min... AMEN.

The Rollercoaster Ride (Why Take The Risk?)

2007-09-09T18:13:00.000+09:00

Bigla akong natakot.. I mean, I've always believed in the wheel of life.. in balance. You should expect that after the happiness, loneliness follows... It's always like that.
I am suddenly scared. Really. I said everything was falling in the right place. Kaya???
Rollercoaster ride? The best description of falling in love.
The ride to the top was just indescribable and then suddenly, with full force, speed and without effort, it is as if everything hits rock bottom...
Natatakot ako..
Totoo.. parang okay na lahat. Pero.. panu pag hindi pala?
Hinay-hinay muna ako.. mahirap mag-expect.. la pa yung thumbs up ni Papa GOD eh.
Unless GOD wills it, I should not expect too much.
Hmmmm... "What's bothering me?"
Haha! I think it's something I have to tell him myself.
Meanwhile.. I'll pray.. and pray..
Only GOD has the answers eh.
I have faith... and if GOD approves, I'll take the risk... it is only then that I know I've got nothing to worry about.

catch me i'm falling?!

2007-09-03T12:04:00.000+09:00

i'm keeping my fingers crossed.. i don't wanna assume or expect anything..
i'm just going with the flow.. letting nature take it's course.. as i said, if it's gonna happen, then it was meant to be... but if not, nothing will be sacrificed..
all my life, i've been waiting. i did not flirt with anybody. yeah, i tried to have a relationship which was bound to fail but i tried to hang on (for 2 years!), that relationship was really meant to teach me a lesson in loving and having a commitment with somebody. if you cannot accept someone wholly, do not go into a relationship with him. There's no point in being miserable together. I loved somebody and reserved myself for that dream of us together.. but that did not happen.. and I had been released just lately. Finally closure.. a blessing from him.. with these line..."If there's someone you feel could be the one you're waiting for, take the risk.. don't let him pass by."
Now... everything's falling in the right place.
He is ironing things out in his side. Trying to grow up coz he's younger (by a year compared to me), catching up in the real world, learning to be independent (he had been sheltered)... We are friends. He did not tell me the real him coz he wanted me to know it first hand.. he invited me in his life and I saw what he is like at home, got to met his family, hanged out with his friends..
Step by step, I know in my heart, we'll get there.
If GOD willed it then, thy will be done.
We both agreed to this statement.. due to wrong relationships before... now.. this time... we'll do it right.

my boys

2007-09-01T11:14:00.000+09:00

malapit na nila ako layasan... huhuhu...
the brothers i never had..
i love being with them coz i don't pretend to be someone i am not. parang kung anu naisip yun na yun... kung ano naisip gawin.. gagawin.. kung san feel magpunta.. go...
pag sila kasama ko.. i'm in good hands.. kesehodang maglasing ako.. hindi ako maaano kasi they'll take care of me...
iiwan na nila ako...
magkakasama pa rin sila pwera me!
hmmmmp!!!!
la lang.. i know GOD has plans for us. AMEN.

M.F.E.O

2007-08-18T13:52:00.000+09:00

Are we?? Dami na development ng lovelife ko. HAHA. For a change.
M.F.E.O (Meant For Each Other).. Are we??
Birthday nya kahapon, punta dapat kami sa kanila pero di natuloy, bumabagyo eh..
Sya nag-leave kaya mga friends nya na friends ko na rin ang kasama kong nag-relax sa 10th floor.. with free beer and videoke.. I really helped myself with the beer last night.. Naka-isang pitsel ata ako.. ahihihi.. Mga kunsintidor naman ang mga kasama ko.. Alam namang magdadrive ako at sakay sakay sila eh hindi ako pinigilang uminom...
I enjoyed being with them.. really.. so it saddens me that they'll leave by the end of month.. Demobilized na sila kasi patapos na yung project namin. Dami pa namin plano eh.. Road trips.. gigs.. et al.. I love being with them coz i just be myself, jologs and all (they've seen me in my worst.. at yun eh pag lasing ako! Hehe.), they experienced how I drive and hindi big deal sa kanila na kakaragkarag ang kotse ko at namamatayan ako ng makina.. sumasama pa rin sila sa akin.. at madali sila ayain.. pareparehas kaming kaladkarin..
Kagabi, after sa 10th floor eh sumama pa sila sa apartment.. mag-isa ko nga lang kasi pag weekend.. siempre minus HIM.. kwentuhan.. no holds barred.. anything goes.. at in fairness saya talaga nila kakwentuhan.. lahat i-spill out.. kesyo ilaglag ang friend nilang me bday ng panahong iyon at itinutukso sa akin.. keber ba kahit ma-turn off ako.. Sabi eh matatakutin, me hika at hindi raw kaya mabuhay ng mag-isa ng future ko.. Pag nagkatuluyan kami ako mag-aalaga sa kanya.. san ka makakakita ng mga ganung kaibigan?
Nung nagkakainitan na ng kwentuhan at mukang papatila na yung ulan.. nagyaya naman ako.. punta kaming Malabon.. haha.. alas onse na ata yun.. malamang epekto pa rin ng isang pitsel na beer na ininom ko.. nakapambahay na nga ako nun.. sabi ko ganun na lang ako kasi magdadrive lang naman ako.. na nag-result sa comment na, "Ano ka ba, ganyan suot mo eh mamimeet mo ang mga future in-laws mo."
Hindi naman natuloy ang on impulse kong napag-isipan at tinawagan na lang nila ang damuhong malamang maging future ko (considering ang takbo ng mga pangyayari).. pinakausap sa akin sa telepono.. at siempre parang ganito ang dialogue..
MJ: Happy birthday. (Sa napakalambing na tono.. sabay tawa ng malakas!)
G: Kaligayahan ikaw ba yan? Tawa pa lang lam ko na eh! (Sabagay kung tatagalugin nga naman yung tunay kong pangalan eh ganun yun.)
MJ: (Tawa uli) Punta kami jan! Baha pa ba?
G: Kayo... dun na lang kayo dumaan sa..
MJ: Sandali si Kuya na lang kausapin mo.. sya naman me alam.. magdadrive lang ako.. (inabot ko ke Kuya ang fone at nag-usap sila.. binalita na rin ni Kuya ang bad news about their demobilization.. pagkatapos nila mag-usap inabot uli sa akin yung fone.)
G: Oi.. eto totoo to..
Mamimiss kita...
MJ: Lasing ka ata eh.
G: Hindi ah.
MJ: Nu ka ba. Mauna na lang kasi kayo sa Australia para me susundo sa akin pagpunta ko dun ng March!
G: (Tawa lang)
MJ: (Binalik ang fone keKuya)
Kuya: Text ka na lang namin kung tutuloy kami ha. Mahaba na to.. malaki na babayaran mo! (Sa cellphone kasi yun.) Ay! Hindi ba ikaw ang tumawag? Haha. Sige, sige pre. Text ka namin kung tuloy kami.

Ayun.. hindi naman kami natuloy kasi umulan uli.. mga mag-aalas dose uwi na rin sila.. Inihatid ko sila sa labasan. At ambadtrip.. medyo praning ako nun kasi si Riu (yung me ari ng phone, me 3rd eye yun eh..) hay naku parang tatakutin pa ako, eh matatakutin din ako.. takot tuloy ako nung pabalik na ako ng bahay.. alas dose na eh.. maulan pa.
M.F.E.O.. yun ang title nito di ba?
Pwede.. kasi kagabi nakachat ko rin si Dave.. and finally the part about me and him finally closed.. sabi ko nga, it is like my past was giving me the go signal to turn my attention to my future so it could be with me in the present.
Sana.. sana..
Nung isang araw.. sa kotse.. kasi nga tinutukso talaga kami.. (nun pang umpisa ng project nung room mate ko, at ngayong me reinforcement sya ng tagatukso eh parang ika-career ata ang pagsusulong na kami ng gitarista ang MFEO).. while I was driving etong si Kuya eh bumanat ng.. "Kelan ba monthsary nyo.".. Ang reaction ko eh.. "Aba't talaga namang hindi kayo paawat ha.".. sagot naman ng gitarista ko na malamang maging future ko.. "Sa September.. kasi wala na tayo dito nun. Haha."
If he makes the first move.. malamang magkatotoo yun.. Kasi ayun sa aking schedule.. Dapat ang anniversary ko eh sa September 9!
Sya nawa.

good news

2007-08-17T01:04:00.000+09:00

kahit bumabagyo sa labas... masaya ako kasi...
me natanggap akong sulat galing sa bossing namin... commending and appreciative.. that was the nature of that letter.. katuwa lang..
tapos...
bday ng gitaristaa ko bukas.. punta dapat kami sa malabon kaso baha ata dun ngayon.. wish ko.. sana umalis na yung bagyo by 8AM.. para makapunta kami sa kanila.. lumang bahay daw yung house nila eh.. kausap ko sya kanina, it seems that he would be happy if our plan of going to their house will push through.. praktis na to (as in serious) ng banda para tuloy na yung "gig" ng aug. 31...
hanggang dun lang ang kwento.. sa ngayon.. wish ko lang.. umaraw na sana bukas.. para kasama namin si bumble bee magpunta.. di ko feel mg-commute! saka gusto ko dalhin yung kotse ko ng malayuan... SANA.
pero..as usual, THY WILL BE DONE.

24! and counting...

2007-08-12T21:34:00.000+09:00

Anu-ano ba ang ginawa ko noong 23 ako?? Me na-achieve ba naman ako?
From August 9, 2006 to August 9, 2007 eto ang mga remarkable na pangyayaring pedeng i-bookmark sa buhay ko...

1. Bumili ako ng kakaragkarag na kotse (Feb 2007).. ang forecasted ko, mabibili ko na yung Roadrunner ko ng mga panahong ito.. kaso, sooobrang mahal nya at ayokong mabaon sa utang.. so I settled with Bumblebee.. buti na lang nauso ang Transformers! Kung hindi, hay naku, malamang, hirap tanggapin ng lipunan ang pinakamamahal kong kotse.

2. Sa isang taon, nakatatlong Motorola ako.. L6, V3 at yung current ko eh Rcker.. nasa Papa ko na yung L6, yung V3 nasa Ate kong panganay.. and of course.. akin yung latest. Gastos noh?? Hindi ko naman totally ibinigay kasi binabayaran ng Ate ko yung V3 sa Mama ko.. at ginagamit ni Mama sa mga pangangailangan sa bahay.. so parang hindi rin ako nababayaran.. pero ewan.. ang hirap mag-explain kapag kaperahan na ang usapan eh.. basta pag nagbigay ako sa bahay la na yun computation. Period.

3. Lumipat kami ng bahay, nag-subscribe ako ng Smartbro.. at feeling independent na ako! Sa company dorm kasi medyo sheltered pa ako.. hatid-sundo ng shuttle.. lang binabayarang utilities at salary deduction kaya in general la ako pinoproblema. Sa lifestyle ko ngayon, mag-isa sa apartment ng weekend, sa Southmall pag la magawa, internet magdamag.. anytime pede umuwi kasi me kotse naman.. Ayun.. pangarap ko yung ganitong life nung bata ako eh.. Na-achieve ko naman at OK lang.. sa totoo lang.. lang remarkable dun.

4. At least naman konkreto yung lovelife ko. Hindi pangarap lang di tulad ke David! Eto.. nagkikita kami, nag-uusap, nabibwisit sa isa't isa.. trying to read between the lines.. sinusubukang i-decode ang action ng isa't isa.. andyan sya eh. Pag nabwisit ako sa kanya sinasabi ko harap-harapan.. pag sya naabwisit sa akin.. la sya sinasabi totally. HAHA. Nag-greet sa akin advance ng 2 days..late rin ng 2 days.. nung mismong araw.. hindi man lang nagparamdam.. tapos nagtext nung Friday night mag-aalas dose na.. anu kaya yun?? Anlabo namin pero gusto ko sya.. hehe. Dalawang tao na ang nagsasabi sa akin na baka naman nag-a-assume lang ako.. baka di naman nya ako gusto.. Dalawang tao rin ang hindi man direkta eh obvious namang inilalakad sya.. Malabo na kung malabo.. pero wag muna natin tuldukan yung kwento.. bukas magkasama na naman kami eh. Birthday nya sa Biernes.. pero kuripot naman yun, asa pa akong ililibre nya kami.. Kaibigan ko na l ahat ng kaibigan nya.. alam ko yung kwento ng buhay ng mga kaibigan nya pero sya na pinag-ugatan kung baket ko naging kaibigan yung mga iyon in the first place eh hindi ko ganun kakilala (hindi ko nga sure kung ilan silang magkakapatid eh!) EWAN. Yan ang pinaka-the best na description sa relasyon namin.. we're definitely not friends eh.. but we could be more than one? Parang dapat ata mag-start muna kami sa basic.. ang babaw kasi pag attraction lang ang basehan di ba? Haaaayyy... EWAN.

If I Believe

2007-08-04T00:12:00.000+09:00

Hayy.. This is my song tonight..

Gusto kong maiyak habang pinapakinggan tong kantang to ngayon kasi sobrang nakakarelate ako. Hay nakakainis!! Sabi ko na nga ba eh.. kasi close kami nung gitarista ko.. sa totoo lang, mahuhulog na ako... unting push na lang. Nakakainis.

Naiisip ko ito ngayon dahil ba sa:

a. I really enjoy being with his set of friends, as in suuuupeer. In ako sa crowd nila at sila naman yung tipo na tinotropa ko.

b. I like being close to him, his prescence makes me feel secure.

c. I just have to sing the lyrics and he'll supply me with the music. Naeenjoy ko yun masyado. Tipong nagtitinginan lang kami tapos nagkakaintindihan na kami kung ano gagawin. Minsan nga kakanta lang ako kahit ano, sasabayan nya na yun agad-agad ng gitara. Ang lupet ng talent!

Siempre all of the above ang sagot.

Kunti na lang talaga hulog na ako.
Delikadong posisyon.. pero pano kung sya pala?

Pano nga kaya?

Thank's GOD I'm BUSY!

2007-07-28T12:36:00.000+09:00

That is my pipe rack they are erecting. O di ba? Anlupet. Naka-isang frame na sila! Ako nag-design nitong pipe rack na to. Nag-email pa sa kin yung checker ko na nasa Saudi ngayon na hindi raw tatagal to. HAHA. Loko yun! Sarap lang ng feeling. On-going na ang construction ng project namin.. at feeling ko engineer na engineer na ang drama ko. Charing!!!

Wala pa ring development ang lovelife ko. Imbierna! Di pa nag-email si Mr. Philippines at umaaligid ang gitarista ko. Mas close naman na kami ngayon nung gitarista ko, manonood pa nga dapat kami ng gig nila ngayong August.. kaya lang kung maari ayoko na sya i-consider! Malisyosa kasi ako. Para kaibigan lang talaga! Eh kung me malisya mag-expect pa ako eh sa totoo lang la sya kwenta. Kuripot kasi. Haha. Praktikal rin to noh!

Ako in-charge sa newsletter ng department namin. Kung bat naman kasi ni-raise ko pa yung issue nung meeting namin ayan tuloy me dagdag akong trabaho! Pero okay lang naman. I love writing. It is one of my passions. Although, I do not care much about how people will react on my writing I just love expressing whatever is in my mind. At feeling ko, it is about time that we showcase those talents in our newsletter. Yung sa ibang department kasi napaka-boring! Gusto ko yung amin parang written by the person concerned. Technical know-how man yung topic, the contributor could be one of the lead engineers para credible! Tipong they knew that topic by heart so they could write their understanding about it in their own words.. hindi yung kokopya at magku-quote sa technical references. That is boring!

Newsletter.. yung banda namin.. add mo pa yung SANGKATUTAK kong trabaho.. I'm definitely one busy lady! Okay lang naman.. I intend to fully utilize my capabilities... in preparation with my graceful exit. Kasi I'd rather leave a mark than to be totally forgotten. I wanted to point out in the future that I loved the company and as far as I am concerned I was loyal. My reason for resigning will be be because I have to take the next step and that I already achieved my full potential with them. That is the best I could give and I couldn't give more. I'd rather leave with their blessings NOT with their hard feelings.

Bottomline.. I am still alone.. waiting.. waiting.. waiting.. BUT thanks to my current work load, I have not been impatient about it. (For one not blessed with patience, THAT is truly remarkable! HAHA!!)

Sapay Kuma...

2007-07-21T10:31:00.000+09:00

Oo na.. aaminin ko na.. parang ang buhay ko eh walang saysay kasi wala nga akong lovelife! Hindi naman masama ang loob ko.. coz.. quoting a nun (na nakasabay ko lang sa bus on my way home), she exclaimed, "Watch out ha, God had been spoiling you.." Yeah. I agree. Because I usually get what I want... but maybe it is so because I knew what I want in the first place.

I decided I want Mr. Philippines.. coz I wanted to be Mrs. Philppines. HAHA. I realized that the time he resigned. Kaya ngayon eh ewan ko kung pano kami magkakatuluyan. I-email ko rin siguro tulad ng ginawa ko sa bestfriend nya. HAHA. Di ba? Me untold story to pag nagkataon na kami ang magkatuluyan. I'm telling it here though.. kahit malabo pang magkatuluyan kami... (as of now)

Ang kwento...
It all started that I have a crush on JC. So he was the original apple of my eye. In fact, he had been the subject of my previous blogs. So, I went to Japan and came back and it has always been JC. Eh in-email ko nga etong si JC para ma-confirm kung sya nga ang "the one", coz my instinct says so. And so I asked him that two questions which will tell if my assumption was correct pero it turned out sobrang NO yung answer.. That was last year.. Lumipat yung project nila ng 9th floor so mas lalong hindi na kami nagkikita lately..
Tapos.. na-discover ko si Mr. Philippines. Ang tagal nya ng nag-eexist pero hindi ko pinapansin unang-una dahil kaibigan sya ni JC at pangalawa dahil likas lang talaga akong suplada. Nagpansinan nga lang kami nung malapit na sila umalis kasi magkasama kami sa project, parehas kaming Ilocano at parehas kaming naglaro sa sportsfest. Kaya ngayon, pwedeng sya ang connection namin ni JC. Kaya ipinagpipilitan ng instinct ko na me dapat me connection kami ni JC dahil ke Mr. Philippines.. pedeng ganun.. pero siempre.. as of now, hindi ko pa alam. Hindi ko pa sya in-email. HAHA. Saka na. Pag me alibi na ako para i-email sya. In fairness, kung tama yung sagot nya dun sa dalawang tanong ko (Kung me gf sya at kung katoliko sya), ay naku. Kami na. Matutuwa ang mga magulang namin kung kami ang magkakatuluyan.. (dahil Ilocano kami parehas.. at parehas pa kaming Engineer. Kayat da Mama nga adda maawagan da nga abalayan. Heheh. Babaw.) Wait natin ang next chapters.. Pero, ipalubos na ni Apo.. ket sapay kuma nga sikami ti agkatuluyan. Sapay kuma...

sa ibang kwento...
hindi ko pa kina-career ang paagpunta ng Australia pero medyo naayos ko na yung papers ko. Me agent na ako so sila na bahala dun. March next year tuloy na ako dun.
Malapit na ako mag-24.. excited! Haha. Sabi ko, on my 24th year, ang challenge ko sa sarili ko eh.. "explore new grounds"..

ania pay ti maibagak.. awanen.. maliban ti..
sapay kuma. ^o^

D Latest (First Edition)

2007-07-05T22:32:00.000+09:00

makakanood ako ngayon ng Which Star Are You From.. aga nauwi! Yehey!!

Mountain Climbing (First ever at Mt. Pundaquit, San Antonio, Zambales)

Now I get the joy of exploring outdoors.. living outside your comfort zone and all the conveniences.. amidst the forces of nature.. I loved it. Tiring.. but worth it. The experience made me stronger physically, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally.. it is a sport that deals with shaping up your whole being..

Question..Ano ang pinakaagusto ko sa mountain climbing? Matulog sa tent, kumain outdoor, tumihaya at titigan ang langit, kwentuhan ng buhay-buhay without reservation, at ang feeling ng unexploited nature.. SARAP!

Mga Kababalaghan
For two consecutive days.. dami kababalaghan na nangyari sa akin.. nung isang araw, me nagparamdam sa office.. unexplainable lang kasi kaya ini-insist ko na multo. Me mabango kasi, amoy bagong ligo na panlalakeng scent eh puro naman kami babae, at nung bumalik yung colleague namin eh hindi naman sya yun.. parang nag-move yung amoy and when i was trying to pinpoint where it was coming from eh me malamig na hangin akong naramdaman...
kanina naman.. before ako maligo.. me nakita akong snake.. sa me pintuan namin.. lumusot sya sa awang ng floor.. paraa akong tinutukan ng baril.. hindi ako maka-react.. kasi alam ko that i need to respect life... ipagpray ko na lang na di na sya bumalik..

ATBP..
wala pa ring development.. pero si GOD na bahala dun.

extra extra

2007-06-29T11:04:00.000+09:00

mountain climbing tomorrow at Cuatro Picos, Brgy. Pundaquit, San Antonio Zambales...
all my gears are ready but i still have some preparations to attend to..
we'll meet tomorrow at 3Am so decided to come to the office late today and I'd be coming from there instead of from my apartment. anyway, it's too early and i don't have my car with me right now.. it's more convenient if i'd be coming from the office.. besides i still have a lot to do.. so there..
it's my first climb so i dunno what to expect.. i like communing with nature so i'm really looking forward to this.. as i have explained from my colleagues (who btw are into mountain climbing but have not yet joined them so..) i need to go to this climb to start up my mountain climbing experience..
joining us would be UPM.. actually they organised the climb.. so it would be us joining them..
i better end with this.. coz i still need to go to the mall and buy the stuff i'll be needing.
wish me luck.

Jogging

2007-06-23T08:13:00.000+09:00

As usual busy pa rin sa trabaho plus ang sangkatutak kong extra curricular activities.
Kasama ako sa volleyball team namin at weekly me game kami. So far, wala pa naman kaming talo so all is looking good for our team. Defending champion kami so me pressure to do our best.
Maliban dun, eh nag-start na ng practice yung "band" namin. Mga colleagues ko rin lang naman kasama ko. First practice namin eh la naman kami natapos. Wala nabuong kanta.. parang get together lang eh. Sayang lang yung oras, to think na busy pa kami sa trabaho.. hopefully next practice would be better. Me line up na ko ng songs na kakantahin... mostly pieces that boasts on the talent of the instrumentalists and songs that has lyrics that hopefully would touch the listeners. Dun lang naman namin to ipipeperform sa 10th floor ng building namin. Me friday night activity kasi sa amin.. free ang beer at videoke at pwede kami magperform doon. Hopefully maging successful ang practice para okay ang performance..
Kanina eh nag-jogging ako.. sa village lang namin.. in preparation for our mountain climbing next week... Kung lakad lang... kahit ilang kilometro kakayanin ko.. in my own pace.. pero pag nag-jogging na.. nauubusan ako ng energy.. ilang metro pa lang, para na akong magba-black out. Namamanhid yung ulo ko.. siguro hindi na umaabot dun yung dugo.. kelangan kong sanayin yung katawan ko sa exercise.. hindi lang pampayat kundi mas maraming health benefits kung regular ang pagja-jogging...

umuulan..
sarap ng feeling.. finally... hindi ko ma-feel na tag-ulan ngayon eh.. sobrang init pa rin kasi...

Not Yet Ready

2007-06-14T22:56:00.000+09:00

ang dami kong pinaplanong extra-curricular activities ngayon.. sana lang mapangatawanan ko.
hindi pa pala ako ready. HAHA.
labo noh??

at bat kaya ganun.. umuulit lang ako.. kasi type ko uli si David. Puro na lang si David eh di rin naman kami magkakatuluyan kahit pa maging square ang mundo.. kainis... si dave kasi ang standard ko..

hindi na nabago.
kainis noh?

Volunteering ATBP.

2007-06-12T07:45:00.000+09:00

In my attempt in having a purpose driven life, I am volunteering for PAWS and World Vision.
Trip ko lang. Mag-aapply pa lang naman ako. Eh pabagobago naman ako ng isip... pero sana mapangatawanan ko rin... Para naman me silbi ang buhay ko.
Sa ibang balita.. kung matutuloy yung binubuo naming banda ni "future", malamang benefit show ang mangyayari.. Kelangan kasi ng books nung day care center dun sa isang baryo sa probinsya namin.
Ang dami kong naiisip na makabuluhan. Sana lang yung drive at passion eh manatiling naandito sa akin at hindi sana ako tamarin ng magawa ko naman yung mga dapat kong gawin.

Am I Ready??

2007-06-02T23:00:00.000+09:00

There's this guy...

We have a lot in a common but our passion with music was the main reason we became close. Compared to other "prospects", we have a lot of moments together.. you know just the two of us. Dati pa eh imbes na magtanong yun personally eh ilo-Lotus Notes pa samantalang nasa kabilang desk lang ako. Di pa kasi kami close nun.

Ngayon eh close naman na kami. Sya kasama ko kanina sa sportsfest namin.. feeling ko kaintri-intriga na nga kami. Pag ang guy ba, tipong di ka maiwanan, ayaw umalis sa tabi mo, hovering ang prescence, touchy, pag nag-usap kayo parang kayong dalawa lang ang nagkakaintindihan.. pede bang i-assume na me gusto sya sa yo? (sagutin mo nga Jeeper tutal ikaw lang naman dumadaan dito =_=, naguguluhan ako eh.. a guy's perspective would help y'know.)

Gusto ko ng magpakanormal eh... at tumulad sa majority ng mga tipikal na babae...

I'll cross the bridge when I get there.. meaning, if he voiced out his intentions.. then and there na lang ako magdedecide..

.... kung ready na nga ko.

Shelter

2007-05-27T08:33:00.000+09:00

What keeps me busy these days.... Ang laki rin nito eh. Limestone preparation shelter... BORING. Heheh. Lagi namang boring pag trabaho ang usapan.
Kahapon eh kasal nung batchmate ko (from work, sampu kaming magkakabatch na sabay-sabay tinanggap at nag-train). Sya rin ang unang nagresign sa amin.. me binding kasi kaming 3 years, eh April next year pa yun matatapos.. ang joke namin eh.. "Aba, nakapagpyansa ka na.. Laya ka na sa wakas!". HAHA. Parang preso, eh kung tutuusin eh di naman kami aping-api sa trabaho namin. We just like joking about our binding contract. At siguro wala lang talaga kaming mga kwenta. 2 down, 8 to go.. My assumption is only one of us will actually stay with the company. Kasi sya at yung wife nya eh parehas na nagwowork sa company.. so 7 to go.. malamang pang-lima akong aalis..
Nabanggit ko na rin na wala akong sense of direction.. eh kahapon I am supposed to meet my colleague at SM North tapos sabay na kami puntang UP Chapel (dun yung wedding).. From Alabang, eh di ko ganu sure how to get to SM North.. swerte naman, habang naghihintay ako ng bus eh me nakita pa akong isang colleague.. sabay na kami nag-MRT. Buti na lang andun sya! Hindi rin talaga ako pinapabayaan ni Lord. Heheh. So mula Alabang me kasabay ako, tapos from SM North naghihintay yung isang colleague ko.. tapos nung pauwi eh kasabay ko naman yung isa pang colleague ko. Eh yung ibang batchmate ko kasama nila mga jowa nila.. wala man akong ganun eh hindi naman ako pinabayaan ni Lord noh! Yesterday, I have three different guys who accompanied me. Well.. close naman ako sa mga colleagues kong guys kasi nga wala akong brother. Ayun.. ganun lang. HEHE.

Feeler!

2007-05-20T07:31:00.001+09:00

Nagbabasa ako ng journal ko nung college. Kakatawa. Amfeeling ko talaga! HAHAH. At ang pinaka-overused kong description sa sarili ko eh.. "hopeless".. HAHA! Utang na loob! Magtu-24 na ako ngayong taong to, kelangan ko ng mag-improve!

Andun yung history ng pagsintang pururot ko ke David. Hay naku.. FEELER talaga ako kasi masyado akong ma-feeling. Hindi magandang pagsamahin na ugali yung insecure na feeling maganda. Hindi ko na iko-compare ng sarili ko kahit kanino. At saka, DUH! Para naman kasing kacompare compare ako sa iba. I'm atypical, unconventional and non-conformist. Iba ang perspective ko sa buhay. Although, aaminin ko, kelangan ko rin naman talaga mag-effort ng magmukha naman akong babae.

Pero... kahihiyan talaga yung mga pinagsusulat ko sa journal ko. FEELING!!! Yucks! I'm turning 24 this year and I should stop having illusions that I am like any other girl. Ipaubaya na natin sa iba ang pagjojowa. Hindi ata ako designed for that.. Pero mag-aasawa ako in the future. Malamang sa tipo ko eh unconventional ang rason ng pagpapakasal pero kelangan eh. Sabi ko nga sa parents ko eh i-arrange na lang nila. Me tiwala naman ako sa taste nila. Pag di ko feel eh hanap na lang uli sila ng iba.

Anyway.. hopeless romantic naman talaga ako, ang kaso realistic din.. kahit pa siguro maghimala ang langit at pede kami ni David eh tatanggi na lang ako. Sakit lang ng ulo pag yun ang nakatuluyan ko. Ayoko pa naman ng ganun.. Gusto ko convenient.

Na-disillusioned na ako pagdating sa love eh. Ang pananaw ko nga, marriage is a hassle and divorce is convenient. Naman. Tama na ang pathetic days of waiting for someone. Kasi if you're waiting, lahat ng pede feeling mo yun na. Papaka-FEELER na naman! Utang na loob noh, tama na! Tanggap ko na ang katotohanan.. hindi ako designed para sa mga ganung bagay. Yung unconditional love, solve na ako sa binibigay ng mga alaga ko. Wag na natin i-expect yan sa ibang tao. Sa panahon ng self-centeredness masyadong risky na umasa ka pa mga ganung bagay.

Para kang tumataya sa lotto eh.. mas malaki pa ang probability na tamaan ka ng kidlat kesa matayaan mo yung mananalong kumbinasyon.

Elections 2007

2007-05-19T08:32:00.000+09:00

I did my part on the last election. I was not just at home watching TV and criticizing. I was out there doing my part.

I did mention on my past blogs that I wanted a career in politics. The last election changed my mind. I wanted to run next election because wanted to be recognized and I wanted to serve. I realized I do not need to be a politician to achieve that because I had achieve it already by just being a concerned and vigilant citizen.

I campaigned last election for the person I believe is worthy to become the leader of our municipality. My parents requested me to sing in their last miting de abanse. 3 years ago, I did the same thing, and at that time I was just a fresh grad, now I have my title to back me up. I call myself Engineer nowadays and people, well.. they call me like that too. Anyway, I played the guitar and sang for the audience and also part of the performance was to tell them to support this person.. my "stage" parents has a script for me beforehand. As usual, I was overcome by stage fright and the script was forgotten. Heheh.

While my father is playing campaign manager for our Mayor, my mother is busy for the Parish Pastoral Council for Responsible Voting, and since my father's request had been granted, I now would have to satisfy my Mother by agreeing to be a pollwatcher. PPCRV pollwatchers should be unbiased and considering that I had been campaigning, that fact had been waived. I guess they really need volunteers.

From my point of view, the election at least in our municipality had been peaceful and honest. There had been reports of vote buying but the results showed that majority of voters vote for who they believed in. Pollwatchers had been vigilant in looking out for anomalies.

I was supposed to report back in my office that Wednesday, but I have to wait for the final results. I just have to know the figures since the other party really gets to my nerves! Heheh. Yabang eh. Ket naabak da met, kunami ngarud ket, Agbanyos kayon Apo! Kalaslastog da met gamen abak da met. Tsk Tsk! Hahah!

I'd say the sacrifices we made for the elections were all worth it. I was there during the proclamations and it it is a n ice feeling that I played an active role to get to that point. I really do not need to be in politics to serve, I just have to do my part as a concerned citizen. For the next 3 years, I look forward for a brighter future for my town. I will voice out my concerns and I know those with authority will listen. Trabaho nila yun eh, at mangyari mang hindi sila tapat sa sinumapaan nila, eh di ilaglag sa susunod na election! Ganun lang naman yun kasimple.

On Motherhood

2007-05-08T21:20:00.000+09:00

Aaminin ko.. naiinggit ako sa mga batchmates kong me mga baby na. Hindi naman ako magpapaka-ipokrita at sabihing solve na ako basta kasama ko yung aso ko in the future. Siempre gusto ko ring magpakamilya.

Naiinggit talaga ako. As in. Kaso sa takbo ng buhay ko medyo malabo akong magkaroon nun.

Nabangggit ko lang.

Munting Buhangin

2007-05-06T19:51:00.000+09:00

Nag-enjoy ako masyado sa department outing namin nung weekend sa Munting Buhangin, Nasugbu, Batangas. Outing at Team Building daw yun. Nagi-guilty ako ngayon. I had been active in answering the facilitators questions during the team building part that I probably gave them the impression that I'm the type who will stay with the company for a long time. Hay naku. Kung nanalaytay ba sa dugo ko ang pagiging design engineer, why not? Ang kaso, me career path akong sinusunod and the next step would require money and so I have to raise money, ergo, I need to work overseas. Tapos yun eh dito na ako sa Pinas for good. Try my chances in politics kasi I really wanted to make a difference and I believe my town has too much to offer, and its people has too much to learn. Pag nagbago isip ko, mangongontrata na lang ako. Pag business kasi eh ang balak kong pasukin eh yung mangongontrata para sa water system ng isang community. Lagi naman me demand sa tubig kaya malaki kita nun.

Kung kuntento naman na sana ako sa pagiging empleyado eh wala na akong problema sa trabaho ko. Ano pa ba hahanapin ko di ba? Promising yung career ko dito. Okay yung kumpanya ko.... ang kaso, hindi carry ng sistema ko yung monotony ng life ng empleyado eh. Hindi ko hawak yung oras ko.

Okay na okay yung outing. Me mga nakilalang bagong prospect. Mwahahaha! Joke joke. I've been considering that since I got home. The chances of me having suitors are really low. I intimidate guys and unlike most girls, I don't flirt. Halimbawa mang me magkagusto sa akin hindi manliligaw yun. Pupusta pa ako. Kelangan ng sangkatutak na lakas ng loob ng taong manliligaw sa akin. Hindi kasi ako encouraging sa ganoong atensyon. Hindi lang ako sanay. Mas gusto ko pa yung taong caring, loyal at faithful sa yo kesa yung tao na me gusto sa yo tapos close naman sa ibang girls. Possesive kasi ako sa atensyon. Tipong akala ko ba sa kin me gusto, dapat ako lang pinapansin nya. Di ba? Unreasonable na pananaw kaya ang resulta nito pag naglaon eh nauumay yung taong me gusto. Wala pa akong na-meet na kayang mag-commit sa mga demands ko. Eh kapag bf, to the maximum level ang pagiging demanding ko. Kaya, bottom line, wag na lang mag-encourage ng mga nagbabalak manligaw. Hindi talaga ako talaga girlfriend material.

Busy pa rin ako sa trabaho... as usual. La naman bago.

Pag lumuwag luwag sched ko magluluto ako ng masarap isang weekend. Namimiss ko na kasi magluto. =P

Too Tired To Think of an Appropriate Title

2007-04-22T20:57:00.000+09:00

But I still have energy to write a new entry.

Work Drama

I went home last friday and just left behind my work which had a set deadline on that date. Fiesta kasi namin sa prov. And I'm really not happy with my job. And so, to hell with it and off I went home. I texted my immediate boss and told him... "Ibagsak nyo na lang po ako sa PA (Performance Appraisal) sir. Kelangan ko lang po talagang mag-absent." Tapang ko noh? Haha. I really just don't care if they fire me. Provided that if they do, I won't have to pay my training liability, then go ahead, fire me!! See if I care! Haha! I was in that mood last week. I'm really bored with what I am doing but then the time at home gave me a new perspective.

I have to at least enjoy my current job until the time I had set myself to leave. I have to find something that gives me joy in my workplace. In fairness with my employer, I am properly compensated. My finances are stable and I get to apply what I've learned from college. So I guess that should be enough reason for me to appreciate my job.

Birds Nesting on Mama's Garden

Check out the picture. The eggs are already hatched. And at this time, these birds had already flown from their nest. They chose my Mama's orchid pot as a nesting area. Nakakatuwa nga. These are wild birds. Naaalala ko pa nung bagets ako pahirapan maghanap ng umok (ilocano for nest), as in punta pa kami sa medyo magubat na area at aakyat ng puno para makakita ng pugad ng ibon. Pero ngayon nasa garden na lang. Kakatuwa. Maybe they feel secure at that area. Heheh. Sabagay tanda ko pa, namili pa ako ng mga seeds para sa mga ibon. Tinawanan lang ako nila Ma at Pa. Kasi nga wild yung mga ibon na yun kaso ang dami nila, lagi pa sila sa garden namin kaya naisip ko lang na pakainin sila kaya bumili ako ng seeds. Sabi naman ni Papa mga manok daw ang naka-appreciate nung nakabili ako.

Adopt a Scholar

Sabi dun sa 12 Little Things You Do To Help Your Country by Atty. Alex Lacson, one little thing is to adopt a scholar. Sabi 11. 6M daw ang out-of-school-youth dito sa tin. And if we do our share by adopting a scholar, the number of would-be criminals and addicts would probably decline. Tama naman and so I told my father to check who we can help from our relatives. By June I'd probably send some of them to school. I intend to do my part.

No Sense of Direction

Aminado naman ako. Kahit nga sa office nadi-disorient ako. Kanina, hinatid ko yung pinsan ko kasi sya nagdrive nung car ko from province to Manila. Simple lang naman yung daan kaya lang talaga lang wala akong sense of direction kaya ang nangyari nakapag-drive ako sa express way ng wala sa oras. Haha. Hinatid ko na lang sana sya hanggang terminal, hay naku. Ang engot ko talaga as in! Pero at least nalaman ko na kaya ko palang mag-drive sa express way. Hahah. I'm really hopeless!!!! Jojoin nga ako sa mountaineering group sa office. Kako para madevelop yung sense of direction ko. Hay naku. I wish.

Me Mga Pinoy pa ring GAGO!

2007-04-15T00:48:00.000+09:00

Hindi ko lubos maisip kung baket kelangan pang magnakaw ng ibang tao. Para kang nagbenta ng kaluluwa sa demonyo eh.

Muntik nako manakawan kagabi. Mag-isa ko lang naman kasi sa apartment (pag fridays at weekends), pero nakatira kami sa village kaya confident ako na secured yung area. Late na ako natulog as usual kakainternet. Busy ako kagabi katitingin ng pictures ni Charles sa friendster, pini-figure out kung baket ko ba kino-consider yung tao eh kahit pogi wala talaga dating sa kin. Nung nagkakagulo sila sa labas eh keber lang naman ako. Akala ko kasi dumating yung delivery ng tubig. Malay ko bang me nag-aattempt magbukas ng pinto namin at yung ingay eh galing ke Kuya Jeffrey na tumaas agad ang adrenaline ng ma-figure out na me trespasser. Nasa taas yung unit ko at me terrace at ang hindi na-anticipate nung taong yun eh me tao sa baba namin. Obviously, hindi alam nung magnanakaw na me "gwardya" ako. Buti na lang ka-close ko yung mga immediate neighbors ko. Hindi nila ako pinabayaan.

Umaga ko na nalaman yung nangyari. At nag-sink in lang kinahapunan. Galit na galit ako. Me suspect na sila kung sino eh. Yung nasa kabilang bakod kasi eh di na namin village. Balak ko kasi magreklamo sa gwardya. Me threat pala ng nakawan sa village eh. Hindi dapat maging kampante. Inayos ko lahat ng lock, nagdagdag pa nga ako. Tinanong ko na rin kung sino yung suspect kasi pag naulit yung ganitong pangyayari talagang magdadala ako ng pulis susugurin ko yung kabilang bakod. GAGO SILA!!! Naka-open kasi yung window namin at nakita siguro nila na mag-isa ko lang sa bahay. Easy target. Babae pa di ba?

Ngayon, medyo praning ako. But I'm not scared. I'm really really mad. Mataas ang tingin ko sa mga Pinoy at naniniwala ako na me pag-asa pa tayo. Yung mga ganitong pangyayari nakakababa ng moral. Ang daming trabaho baket kelangan pang magnakaw? Dahil sa pangangailan? BULLSHIT! Mga addict lang ang makakagawa ng ganito eh. I'll expect the worst. Sabihin na nating me threat pa rin kahit na alam nila na alam mo na kung sino sila. I might not get to the bottom of this, but one thing for sure. I won't be a victim. Naranasan ko ng malaslasan ng bag. Naranasan ko ng tumira malapit sa riles kung saan wala talagang security. Alam ko ang likaw ng bituka ng mga ganitong klaseng tao. Kung addict ito, dapat i-eliminate sa community. Alam ng tiga-kabilang bakod that we are watching them. Subukan lang nila uli handa na kaming hulihin sila sa akto!

Kahit mamatay ka na sa gutom, hindi sagot ang pagnanakaw. Tandaan nyo yan.

My Soulmate....

2007-04-11T23:47:00.000+09:00

Sya lang ang makakaintindi sa akin.

Pinagtatawanan nila ako pag sinasabi ko na kaya ako pupunta ng Australia eh dahil sa naandun yung aso ko.

Eh yun naman ang totoo... dun ko mahahanap yung soulmate ko. Yung aso ko nga. Sa pagkakaalam ko kasi, wala pang breed ng Tibetan Mastiff dito sa Pinas.

I gave up finding the right one. I mean.. if he comes, he comes. Pero hindi na ako maghhihintay at aasa at magwiwish na everytime na me gusto ako eh sya na.

Hindi ko naman kelangan ng jowa dahil I can manage alone. Gusto ko me inaalagaan at me nagaalaga and if I have Rufus, answered na yung mga needs ko na yun. My dog will just be enough for me to feel secure. Kahit naman dati ke Floyd eh na-experience ko na yung unconditional love na handang ibigay sa yo ng pet mo.

I'm really going to Australia.. so I could finally have Rufus.

Tawanan man ako ng lahat pero as soon as I have him.. I know mas malaki ang probability na magiging matandang dalaga na ako. Heheh.

And I just don't care! Kanya-kanyang trip lang.

Holy Week Happenings

2007-04-09T20:22:00.000+09:00

Umuwi ako nung Holy Wednesday. On-leave na ko nung araw na yun kasi road test dapat yun nung FIAT ko. Iniuwi kasi namin ng Pangasinan yung sasakyan ko. Eh nung sinundo ko sila Papa eh pinatalon ko sa humps yung kotse nadale yung hose ng radiator nagka-leak tuloy kaya pinaayos muna nila.. Pasado ala-una na ng hapon kami nakaalis ng Maynila nun. Nagbaon kami ng talong galong tubig in case na mag-overheat na hindi naman nangyari. Pagdating namin sa San Marcelino, Zambales eh gabi na at wala kaming headlight. Meron namang ilaw pero para lang makita ka ng ibang motorist.. sila hindi mo sila makita.. Pagdating namin ng Iba, umambon naman at wala kaming wiper. Pakiramdam ko isinusumpa na ako ng pinsan ko kasi sya yung driver. Akalain mo yung kailangan naming manghabol ng ibang sasakyan para maki-"headlight" kami sa kanila. Anlupet. Dun ko na-realize kung gaano kahalaga yung road markings. Nakauwi naman kami pasado alas diyes ng gabi. Putek, 9 hours na byahe! Kakaibang experience. As usual adventure uli kasama ng aking FIAT.

Maundy Thursday eh nagsimba ako nung hapon... tapos naalala kong itext yung bruha kong kaibigan. Babalik kasi siya ng Dubai kinabukasan.. sayang naman yung pagkakataon na naandito sya kaya nanghagilap pa ako ng available naming batchmate at sumugod kami sa bahay nila ng alas siete ng gabi. Pa-intindi na nakatira ako sa Pangasinan at etong mga kaibigan ko eh sa Zambales, mga siyam na kilometro lang naman ang pagitan ng bayan namin. Me kotse naman at sinamahan ako ng Ate ko at inabot kaming magkakabatch ng hanggang ala una ng madaling araw sa pagkukuwentuhan.

Good Friday.. nagsimba kaming mag-iina at ako na ang tumatayong opisyal na driver ng pamilya.

Black Saturday... 6:30AM nagpunta kami ng Balaki Island sakay ng bangka ng pinsan ko at kasama ang mga pinsan, pamangkin at mga kapitbahay namin. Nagka-sunburn ako pero sulit naman. Umuwi kami ng ala una ng hapon. Tapos ala sais ng gabi eh larga na naman ako sa Zambales kasi nagyaya na naman yung mga batchmate kong mag-pool. Eh as usual hindi ako makatanggi. I missed them too much to miss out on gimiks. Enjoy din naman. Pero mas masaya yung kwentuhan nung Huwebes. La kwenta kakwentuhan yung mga lalake eh. Competitive kasi sila eh parang payabangan lang.. kaya I'd rather not talk. Imbierna lang.

Easter Sunday.. kainis Mama ko. Pagkatapos akong madaliin kasi ako nga ang driver nung paalis na kami para magsimba eh saka magsi-CR. Hay naku. Renewal of baptism nung Sunday eh, kaming mag-iina lang ata ang me dalang kandila, at ako lang ang umakyat para makisindi sa Paschal candle. (Tamad lang magsimba si Papa kaya di na namin pinipilit, nagiging Pilosopo Tasyo yun pag pinipilit magsimba eh..^-^) Pina-blessan ko na rin yung FIAT ko, eh close kami ni Father.. nung nakaupo ako sa me driver seat eh halos ubusin sa akin yung holy water. Naman oh. Nung gabi, larga naman kami uli sa Zambales kasi alumni homecoming. Kumanta kami nung batchmate ko. Wala kwenta yung gathering na yun. Wala man lang yung mga teachers namin. Umuwi kami ng past 10 ata.. at nung nasa Infanta na kami eh nakasagasa ako ng aso. SOBRANG BAD TRIP! As in. Animal lover ako eh kaya di ko maatim na ako ang dahilan ng kamatayan nung asong yun kaso hindi ko talaga sya nakita. As in!! Pinasa ko na lang yung sisi dun sa dog owner. Iresponsable sila eh. Pabayaan ba nila humiga yung aso nila sa gitna ng daan. Hindi naman sila nagreklamo.. feelng ko gusto talaga nila mamatay yung aso nila.. ang sama nila.

At ngayon.. lunes. Balik Maynila uli. Ang dami pasahero kanina. Akala ko standing na ako sa bus pero swerte namang me isa pang bakante. Swerte talaga.. ang sarap ng tulog ko sa bus eh. Nakanganga pa ata ako. Heheh. Pero pagod pa rin. Haaayyy… Uuwi uli ako sa fiesta namin. Iniwan ko yung kotse ko dun para ayusin ni Papa balikan ko na lang next uwi ko.

Promoted!!

2007-03-25T09:19:00.000+09:00

Engineer 1 na ako!! Kahit wala akong kwentang empleyado. HAHA. Yun lang pangarap ko eh. At natupad ko na. Kaya ko natutupad ang mga pangarap ko eh kasi attainable lahat. Mahirap yung masyadong mataas mangarap made-depress ka lang pag di mo maabot.

Alam ko na rin kung ano gagawin ko sa buhay ko.

I'm planning to shift to environmental engineering when I get to Australia. Idealista kasi talaga ako. Just so I could say I did my part in preserving the environment. Sayang naman ang aking technical skills kung parang sarili ko lang ang nagbebenefit. Malayo yung structural sa environmental pero graduate naman ako ng civil engineering at sakop rin yun ng pinag-aralan ko. The company I am planning to get into next has a commitment to preserve nature. Design firm din sya pero mas marami syang industries na sakop. Hindi lang petrochem.

La lang. Kahit naman entry level lang ako dun eh no big deal. Basta magawa ko yung mga dapat kong gawin. Parang la naman kabuluhan ang existence kung sarili mo lang lagi ang naiisip mo.

Alumni Homecoming

2007-03-18T11:26:00.000+09:00

Katatapos ko magbasa ng tagalog pocketbook by my favorite author, Rose Tan. Apihin nyo na ko la ako pakialam. Maano kung jologs? Nagpapakatotoo lang. =P

Bale nagstart yung story line sa high school reunion at yung bida eh namomroblema dahil sa pananaw nya payabangan lang naman ang silbi ng reunion, eh feeling nya loser sya, so kunwari me dyowa syang mayaman at nag-edit sya ng picture tapos nilagay nya yung mukha nya tapos kunwari yun ang boyfriend nya. Para lang masabi nila na mas okay ang buhay nya sa kanila. Di naman umubra kasi kilala pala nung mga batchmates nya yung lalake tapos andun din yung guy sa reunion at obviously nabuking sya pero me nakialam kaya hindi natuloy yung pagkapahiya nya tapos in the end nagkatuluyan sila nung lalakeng sinabi nyang bf nya kuno.

Hindi yun ang point ng blog na to kundi yung pananaw na ang high school reunion ay para maipagyabang mo kung ano narating mo.

Me Alumni Homecoming kami sa April 8 sa high school na pinag-aralan ko. Bwiset yung mga batchmate ko kasi parang ako lang ang gusto pumunta. Duh! Nobody naman ako nung high school noh, pano ko kaya irerepresent ang batch namin? They usually associate a batch with the valedictorian and the student council officers and I'm neither of those two. Top 20 lang ako nun pero hindi ako sikat!

I wanted to go not because I wanted to show everyone that I had been successful in my career. To show-off my achievements and in result make others feel insecure. Hindi ko ugali ang mang-down ng tao. Pero gusto ko talaga magpunta kasi gusto ko makita yung mga favorite teachers ko nung high school at maka-chikahan sila uli.

Back in high school I'm your silent-type, autistic, anti-social kind of girl. Tumakbo ako sa student council nun pero sa section lang namin ako landslide sa panalo. Wala akong self confidence nung panahong yun and I hate attention. I hate crowd. Kaya naman hindi katakataka na natalo ako. Isnabera lang talaga ako sa mga hindi ko kakilala.

At yun ang nabago ko ngayon. I am more approachable now and I can be friends with anybody in an instant. Kaya I wanna go back. Dami ko kasi reservations nun hindi ko man lang nasabi sa mga favorite teachers ko how thankful I am na kahit hindi ako sikat eh me bilib sila sa akin.

I'm going there not to show-off but to reconnect with the past. I wanted them to know that if not for them I will not be where I am now. Yes, one reason I am confident to go is because the bright future I had been looking forward when I was in high school is the present life I'm having right now. Yet, the main reason I'm going is to tell them that if it's not for the ideals that they had instilled on me when I was younger I will not be where I am in the first place.

Marunong ako tumingin sa pinanggalingan. In the end of my days, everthing will be consolidated. At least I am sure that my past, present and future had been connected. My past shapes up my present and what became of my present will shape up my future.

Back up lang na successful ako. Para di naman apihin ang beauty ko dun noh! Magyabang na kung sino ang gusto magyabang, babarahin ko na lang pag naimbierna ako, pero makikibonding talaga ako sa mga batchmates ko na magpupunta. I'll show off the fact that I'm still the same old me. Hindi na mahiyain pero jologs pa rin as usual. Hindi natinag ng glory that a successful career sometimes induce.

Same old-same old nga. Hanggang ngayon nga WALA pa ring boyfriend. Same old me. (heheh)

The Sentiments of One Pathetic FAN!

2007-03-17T15:39:00.000+09:00

I had been so intoxicated of the fact that my long lost obsession is actually existing and in touch with me right now. The last days I had been living in fantasy land. He's back!! Is this for real??? All I can think about is the reason why all this is happening. Why did fate made our paths crossed? I had been so positive with what happened. Maybe he came back because he really is the one for me. But then I just woke up from that dream. And it happened today.

I'll never really know. Only time can tell. Eversince I harbored those feelings for him, all I do is cry because I know it can never happen. We can never be together. I do not get the point why I feel that way in the first place. Why is he so special? What did he do to make me so obsessed of us ending up together.. He never really cared for me you know.

I thought he did. But then he can't even remember me. I thought I counted.. But then I was so wrong! Why did I even assume that he likes me?

Yeah, he's passionate with what he does... on what he believes. He is not like most of us. He digs music of genre I never even knew existed. He practices a belief that us Pinoys had never encountered. He's so out of this of world. Or best said.. he is so out of MY world!

I'm just a fan you know. All those times.. I thought I was inlove. It was just fascination with someone who lives the way I thought I myself should be living.

Why do I have to hope?
Why does he has to come back and just hurt me BIG TIME this time?

I have faith. And I know.. the answers to my question will come to me.

In time.

Depressed

2007-03-03T22:21:00.000+09:00

Depressed ako ngayon. Ambadtrip.
Dami ko kasi workload. Di ko alam kung madedeliver ko lahat in time. Eh dapat whole week akong bakasyon sa holy week. Sa lagay ko ngayon kailangan ko talaga ng break.. or ako ang magbi-break down. Bad trip talaga.
Pandagdag pa yung kaiisip ko dun sa taong nag-reappear nga sa buhay ko. Hopeless na ako. At dahil sa naunsyami naming date parang isinumpa ako bigla na malabong magka-lovelife pa ako kung hindi sya. Tapos pupunta pa sya ng London at mag-tetemple works daw. Ano yun? Magiging monk sya? Bwiset naman oh. Paano naman kami magkakatuluyan kung ganun ang kwento???
Depressed talaga ako. Nakuha ko na yung sasakyan ko. Eh hirap naman pala talaga kung kakaragkarag yung sasakyan mo. At lalong mahirap kung hindi ka sanay mag-drive. Everytime na lang na hanging ang position ko eh halos maiyak ako sa frustration. Hanak nga makasang-at! Lagi pa ko namamatayan ng makina. Frustrating!
Me broadband na ako. Iniisip kong maki-chat and the like. Yung tipong maghanap ng fafah sa internet. Pero naman, sino niloko ko? Hindi naman magiging successful sa akin yung ganun. I'll keep myself well-informed na lang. Sa business, current events and information of my next destination... Melbourne, Australia....
Undecided pa rin ako kung papasok ako ng opisina bukas... At mafufrustrate na naman sa pagdadrive?? Naman tong buhay na to oh.
Kelan ba iikot ang gulong ng buhay? Ayoko na sa ilalim eh.

TRANSITIONS

2007-02-25T17:44:00.000+09:00

Dami na nangyari.

Nung Valentine's nakatanggap ako ng text mula sa taong walang karapatang mag-reappear sa buhay ko. Ambadtrip naman kasi. Nakalimutan ko na sya last year eh. Meaning obsessed ako sa kanya from 1st year college.. Dami kong what-ifs about him tapos lilitaw uli sya? Bwiset. Anyway, supposedly magkikita kami for a date. Hindi natuloy kasi parang natakot ata sa akin. Heheh. Hello! Makarma sana sya sa ginawa nya noh. Gusto ko lang naman tapusin yung kwento tungkol sa kanya. Paano magkakaroon ng closure kung hindi nagkakalinawan yung mga taong involved?

I just moved out from our company dormitory. Sa apartment na kami ngayon. Kasama ko yung room mate ko kasi parehas kaming evicted dahil daw dalawang taon na kami sa dorm (rule ng company namin na after 2 years eh move out ka na sa dorm). Successful naman ang pag-alis. Nakaayos na rin ako ng sangkatutak kong mga gamit. (As in sangkatutak, 2 years nga lang ako sa dorm pero I crave for comfort kaya sobrang dami kong gamit.) Ngayon eh, kelangan ko pang bumili ng washing machine at water dispenser, at magpakabit ng cable broadband para hindi naman ako mabuang sa apartment. Mag-isa ko lang kasi dun pag weekend. First weekend ko ngayon doon. At grabe! Masaya na akong nakatulog ako ng matiwasay. Siempre praning ako kasi mag-isa ko lang sa bahay. Anyway... peaceful naman ang neighborhood so okay lang. Wish ko lang sa isang taon na pag-stay namin doon eh wala naman akong ma-encounter na problema. At buti na lang napakalapit nya sa mall.. habang hindi pa naikakabit ang cable broadband ko eh dito muna ako sa mall tatambay.

Balak ko nga mag-alaga ng pet. Baka hamster uli. Kasi mas madali alagaan iyon. Nag-attempt ako dati na mag-alaga ng turtle. Kaya lang di ko ma-gets ang mood nya. Namatay tuloy si Frank, my red eared turtle(hope he's happy where he is right now). Kung aso kasi hindi pwede dahil weekend lang ako full time sa apartment. Pag fish.. parang yung turtle din yun.. mahirap maki-communicate.. Pag bird.. naku feeling ko hindi kami makakapag-bonding.. Pag pusa naman.. parang aso rin yun (di ko pa carry amoy ng jebs nun). Bottom line, hamster na lang talaga ang aalagaan ko. Si Floyd, ang pinakamamahal kong pet sa buong mundo, (na siempre wala na ngayon dahil 2 years lang ang life span ng hamster, alaga ko sya nung last year ko sa college) eh teddy bear hamster. Mas malaki kasi sila kesa sa siberian hamster. Mahirap hawakan pati ang siberian pero mas cute yun kesa sa teddy bear.. Undecided pa rin ako kung anong klaseng hamster pero most probably hamster na lang uli. Madami pa kami cage sa bahay sa province nun kasi si Mama nahumaling rin sa pag-aalaga ng hamster dati. Nahawa sa akin. Heheh.

Me kotse na rin pala ako. At sobrang miss ko na kasi pinaayos ko yung aircon. Cheap lang yung car ko kasi pagprapraktisan ko lang naman. Hindi pa kasi talaga ako sanay mag-drive. Last weekend nga eh ibinalik ko dun sa binilhan ko para ayusin ang dapat nilang ayusin. Nag-drive ako from Alabang to Bicutan. Accomplishment yun ha! Kasi yun ang first time na nagdrive ako sa busy road na walang kasama. Medyo sumagi ako jeep at buti na lang flexible ang side mirror ko kaya walang damage. At buti na lang lady driver ako na mukhang eng-eng kaya hindi nag-react ang jeepney driver ng masyadong negative. Heheh.

Ang daming pagbabago ng life ko noh? Supposedly aalis ako this year papuntang Australia kasi talagang yun na yung next step ko eh. Pero, dahil me contract kami sa apartment to stay there for a year imo-move ko na lang yung pag-alis to next year. Tamang tama by then tapos na rin yung training liability ko so wala na akong babayaran sa company. At siempre hinog na ako as a structural engineer. Mabango na ang resume ko sa foreign employers. Heheh.

Pag naikabit yung cable broadband sa apartment... mapapadalas uli ang entries ko. Not that I don't have a social life.. it's just that all my friends are all too busy with their jobs. Hmm.. that would be a nice subject for the next blog.

Till then.

40 years?!

2007-01-19T20:02:00.000+09:00

Naman. Inabot ako ng 40 years bago ko ma-update to. Para namang sobrang busy ako.
Actually... parang ganun na nga. OKay ang trabaho, mapo-promote naman na ako, ME development ang lovelife.. okay ang family.. at achievable naman lahat ng dreams. In short, wala akong maikwento na punong-puno ng damdamin. Heheh.

Nag-pasko.. nag-new year.. Wala pa rin akong kotse. At tinanggap ko naman na ang katotohanan na hindi ako makakabili nun hangga't naandito ako sa Pinas. Kaya nga next year ko na lang itutuloy yung pagpunta ng Australia. Sigurado naman na yun. Ngayong taong ito eh yung bahay muna namin ang ipapaayos ko. Kaya nga di pa ako pwede umalis.

Me sinimulan akong sulatin... Pinamagatan ko yung "Encounters".. true to life yun. Documented lahat ng pagkikita namin nung kinahuhumalingan ko ngayon. Pag nagkataong kami ang magkatuluyan eh ireregalo ko yun sa kanya sa kasal namin. HAHAHA!! Amfeeling.

Hanggang doon lang ang kwento ng buhay ko. Same old pa rin naman ang trabaho. Boring. Kaya wag na lang yun pag-usapan.

Direction Please!

2006-11-18T19:07:00.000+09:00

All I want from my life right now is a direction. I’m quite disappointed that my forecast of having my own car at the end of this year did not come true. Of course I have to prioritize, and my family always have to be first. Nag-umpisa na yung pag-improve ng bahay namin. Next year, yung bakod naman namin ang ipapaayos ko. Clearly, my current job would not provide me with the amount I needed to do my priorities and to achieve my dream.

I know I’ll feel complete with my car, my own house by the beach and with Rufus, Tiff, Ginger and Luna. My only prayer for my lovelife right now is for Charles to find courage to ask me out. I was not counting on it because in the first place, getting involved with a colleague seems too complicated. I imagine our other colleagues butting in and of course, I hate to risk my self-esteem being lowered down again because other people will find it highly peculiar that a handsome guy would even fall for the likes of me. I have to admit, we are out of each other’s league. Although that fact is still to be discovered, from my perspective right now, I definitely do not dig his crowd. I’m not giving up though. I’ll wait with what God has to say. For my part, I just need to be patient and meanwhile, just be nice to him.

One thing for sure, I’m going to Australia. I do not know when.. but I’ll do my best in finding a way to get there. Something is calling me at that place…

For myself.. and partly for my family, I think it is best that I fulfill that plan.

Bad Trip Again

2006-11-11T20:35:00.000+09:00

Naiinis ako kasi walang internet sa dorm namin. Hindi man lang mag-effort ang dorm admin na i-restore ang DSL.

Naiinis ako lalo kasi malabo rin na magpakabit ako ng Smartbro. Akala ko kasi wifi lang yun. Kelangan pa palang magpakabit ng antenna eh since sa company dorm ako nag-i-stay, malabo yun. Kelangan ko pa namang maghanap ng trabaho sa Australia. I'm planning to leave next year....

Anlabo ng buhay ko. Nakakainis. Gusto ko lang naman magkasasakyan at kahit pa promising naman ang career ko dito sa Pinas, ang masakit na katotohanan eh hindi ko naman yun maafford next year.

At next year, expired na ang stay namin sa company dorm. Mag-rerent na ako ng sarili kong place? Iiwanan ko ang convenience ng pagtira sa dorm namin na kung saan hindi ako nagbabayad ng kuryente, tubig, internet, phone at hatid-sundo pa ng shuttle pa-office and back to dorm.

Nung na-overseas assigned ako, naranasan ko naman yung sarili kong lugar. Pero provided pa rin lahat ng company namin. Kahit nga train pass sila rin ang nagpoprovide.

Kaya... next year sarili kong place... makakatanggap na ako ng bills ng kuryente at iba pa? Magco-commute na ako araw-araw?

Anlaking bad trip nun!

Kaya next year.. bahala na si Batman.. pupunta ako ng Australia.

Dear Diary...

2006-10-29T23:12:00.000+09:00

Dahil undas, umuwi ako ng probinsya at nagleave ako ng isang linggo. Maraming trabaho pero nabuburyong na ako sa buhay ko. Not that going home will make a difference. Wala naman akong gagawin dito sa bahay kundi maggitara, kumain. matulog, magbasa ng pocketbook, mag-internet at pagmunimunihan kung ano nga ba talaga ang makakapagpaligaya sa akin.

I must admit, I'm the type who prefers to make my own rules. I'm a self-proclaimed non-conformist and obviously my type would not end up being model employee. That's why I am planning up a courageous move. Involving my career and my life in general.

Seryoso na ako sa paghahanap ng trabaho sa Australia. Hindi naman ako magma-migrate dun. Magtratrabaho lang. Siempre mas malaki kita dun eh. Para pagbalik ko makumpleto na yung pagpapagawa ng bahay namin at mabili ko na yung sasakyan ko.

Onga pala, ipnagpipilitan ko na me crush sa kin si Charles. Iyon eh dahil lubhang napakabait ng pakikitungo nya sa akin. Mahilig pa syang mag-forward ng mga Christian messages sa akin eh di naman kami close. Aba, kung katoliko sya eh kami na lang. Madali naman akong kausap.

Pero kung matutuloy ako sa Australia... saka na lang ang involvement sa kung sinuman. Maari siguro yun kung sasama sya dun sa akin.

Pwede naman.. tutal pareho naman kaming engineer. (Are we meant to be?)

Gosh... maghunus dili nga ako. Nananaginip na naman ako ng gising!

present!

2006-09-30T13:30:00.000+09:00

Akalain mong buhay pa pala ako. I can't believe it myself!
Naman... same-old same-old pa rin naman ang kwento ko so di ko feel mag-update ng blog. Nagbabago lang yung wordings pero yun rin lang ang buod ng kwento.
And that is.. bored pa rin ako buhay ko.
I can still NOT afford my car. And I don't think I'll ever afford that unless I work overseas.
I have a reason to celebrate since I'm transferring to a new project. Halleluyah!!
Wala pa rin akong lovelife, at utang na loob, baket ba kelangang yun na lang ang kwento?
Masaya naman ako sa trabaho, me 600 pesos pa naman akong natira sa ATM ko.. so I think I'll survive.

Pero wish ko lang..
Magkatubig naman na sana. Pero at least me kuryente.
You really can't have it all.

email ito sa mga close friends ko (i-share ko rin senyo)

2006-08-18T20:25:00.000+09:00

i-shi-share ko lang yung nangyari sa ken ngayong day na to.

history muna.. nung nasa Yokohama ako eh me crush ako na nasa Pinas. Malakas yung loob ko nun kasi malayo naman ako so in-email ko sya and in-add ko sya sa friendster ko. Sabi ko.. "I'm obviously interested." Yan ang mismong words ko. OK naman sya. Mabaet. Pero bottomline, he's not "the one" kasi Iglesia ni Cristo sya and me jowa na sya.

Pagbalik ko dito, wala akong balak pansinin sya. Kasi unang-una hindi naman nya ako pinapansin saka nahihiya ako. AS IN! So ganun dapat... hindi dapat kami magpapansinan. MUkha naman syang favorable sa ganung set-up.

Until now....

Wala kasi akong ginagawa ngayon. Lotus Notes lang ang naka-open sa PC ko. Nasa likod ko sya nakapwesto at nahalata ata na sobra akong busy sa pag-e-email kaya nag-email sya sa kin.

Na-overwhelm ako mga bruha!! Di ko alam kung pano magre-react. Ang sabi lang naman eh, bat di ko raw sya pinapansin. Dapat daw friends kami kasi magkababayan kami.

Then and there, naghagilap ako ng lakas ng loob na kausapin sya. AND I DID!!!! Congratulate me. Wheheh. Pero sobrang overwhelming pa rin kaya kelangan kong i-share senyo.

Nahihiya ako. HEheh. Wala naman na akong gusto sa kanya kasi me iba na kong gusto tsaka brotherly na lang talaga ang tingin ko sa kanya. Promise. Hay.. mula ngayon, kelangan ko na syang kausapin. Lahat ng close friends ko sa office alam yung history ko sa kanya. Nakakahiya. Kaya, kelangan kong panindigan na ADING ko lang sya!!

At magpapansin ako sa current prospect ko. Hindi yun mahirap gawin kasi pinapansin naman talaga ako nun.

Naman.. magkaka-lovelife na ba ako??

Wish me luck mga bruha.

ang bagong balita ayon sa akin

2006-07-15T09:30:00.000+09:00

Migration to Australia

It's been too long since my last entry. I'll skip the dramatics and just generalize my description of my current state as still.. confused. 2 months after my arrival and I'm still like this.

Pagbalik ko sa office, pakiramdam ko out of place ako. Ang daming bago na hindi ko kakilala. Nakakafrustrate. Ala pa ako masyado workload kaya nagplano akong magresign. Sabi ko eh, pagbigyan ko naman yung iba na magkaroon ng magandang opurtunidad. I'm equipped with the skills I needed to be competitive abroad. Kahit pa ba napakabata ko eh confident naman ako sa skills ko. Kaya ko kakong i-market ang sarili ko sa ibang engineering firm sa ibang bansa.

Magma-migrate ako sa Australia. Nagawa ko na yung resume ko, isa pa lang naman inapplyan ko. Di ko kasi ugali yung nagsasabay-sabay, lagi ko priority yung first choice ko.

Akala ko eh yun na ang final decision ko. Pero sa ngayon, masaya na naman ako. Kaibigan ko na uli sila lahat sa office, nakipag-set pa ko ng meeting sa mga manager namin para i-voice out ang concerns namin. Ang lakas ng loob ko noh? Kasi sa likod ng isip ko, wala naman mawawala sa akin. Para naman yun sa kabutihan ng lahat. My thinking was, if worst comes to worst, at least ready akong umalis.

Agreeable

Mula nung humaba ang buhok ko at nagmukha akong babae eh medyo napapadalas ang pagtanggap ko ng words and actions of appreciation sa itsura ko.

Agreeable. Appearance and attitude-wise, that would be my best description.

Hindi artistahin pero magandang tingnan.

Hindi ganun kabait pero madaling pakisamahan.

Agreeable nga kasi.

Flattery

I'm brutally frank. And I appreciate people who could be the same to me.

Naisip ko lang... hindi nga ako tipikal. Flattery, lalo na pag obvious na bola lang does not work with me. Pero sa buong lifetime ko, the best flattery I recieved came from a foreigner priest.

Ganito yun.

Catholic school ako nag-aral mula high school hanggang college. Relihiyosa talaga ako at natural na sa akin ang ma-appreciate ang pagsisimba kaya madalas ko yun gawin. Nung third year college ako, pagkatapos ng sunday mass, kaugalian ko na yung magmano sa pari. Matanda na yung pari na yun at bumisita lang sya sa school namin kaya kahit pa regular akong taga-simba eh hindi kami pamilyar sa isa't isa.

Nakangiti ako nung nagmano ako sa kanya.. he was looking at me tenderly, the way a father will look at his daughter and told me, "The glory of God shows in your smile."

Flattery is a statement you say to others to make them feel good about themselves. It could either be true or false. But one thing is for sure, it's a statement based on the opinion of the person giving it.

Sa isang tulad ko na trying hard magpaka-good girl, ang statement na ganun mula sa pari eh sobrang appreciated. I still have my insecurities despite everything I've achieved.. despite what I have become. Remembering those words by a total stranger, revives my faith and belief that GOD exists and he's pleased with me.

Just to note, those words came while I'm still dreaming, hoping, and trying to become what I am right now. Those were the worse times y'know.

The View From The Window Seat

2006-06-17T10:38:00.000+09:00

It took me quite sometime before I blog about my coming home… I’m in a phase right now. It’s just that I’ve been confused lately. I do not know what to do with my life. Katawa noh? Considering that I’ve achieved most of my dreams.. (I invested my hard-earned money on my family’s farm and my pajero will follow probably end of this year- nagbago pala isip ko. Ayoko na uli ng Hilux. Pajero na lang uli ako.) Darating din pala yung point na na-achieve mo na yung 90% ng dream mo, at para kang lutang. Hindi mo alam kung ano ang next… I’m brainstorming. Masyadong maganda ang nangyayari sa buhay ko, kaka-overwhelm. I’ve always believed that life has it’s balance. Hindi dapat masyadong masaya dahil yung lungkot eh kasunod nun for sure and I would hate having that in the same intensity. Anyway, enough of the drama.. tutal la ko sa mood magsulat eto na lang muna....

Here are some of the pics taken from my window seat on that flight back home...

*JAL (Japan Air Lines Boeing 747) Before take-off.

*At the top

Most of my plane shots are .avi files and as much as I would like to consider myself techie, I really have no idea how to show those files here. Anyone there who knows. I'd appreciate the help. ^o^

nananaginip ng gising

2006-05-24T23:55:00.000+09:00

I really can manage well alone. I am independent, and if I need help, my friends are always available for me. Truly, the good Lord had blessed with so much. My life even without too much effort on my part seems to have a direction of it's own. I'm really just going with the flow. Sometimes I'm up, sometimes I'm down, whatever way, I always end up okay. In everything, it's always my faith that keeps me in balance. God took really good care of me.

I think it's quite obvious that I'm religious. My faith is unwavering. No matter what happens to me, no matter what people say, I'll always stand to what I believe in.

Right now, all that I've dreamed of had been granted. When I was high school, I only dreamed of entering one university, this is the only school I took an entrance exam, and eventually I got in and dreamed of graduating after 5 years which did happen, and then I dreamed of passing the licensure exam and getting into the my dream company (which of course is the only company I've applied to).. all this things were granted.. when i got into my dream company, i dreamed of going to japan- granted! next in line, my car, our house.. all material things... all attainable.

Minsan, dini-discern ko pa rin kung para san ang buhay ko. Simple lang naman mga pangarap ko kaya natutupad lahat. Partikular kasi ako kung mangarap, hindi in general. Kung tanungin mo ako kung anong sasakyan ang gusto ko, ang sagot ko? Toyota Hilux, 2nd hand around 300-400K. Kelan ipaparenovate yung bahay namin? Kahit next year kaya yun.

Gusto ko ng magka-boyfriend. Ano ang hinahanap ko?

Matangkad (5'8"). Katoliko. Mas marami na-achieve kesa sa kin. Madaling utusan. At panghuli gusto nya magka-jowa kasi gusto nya me nag-aalala at mag-aalaga sa kanya. Seryoso ako. Gusto kong me inaalagaan.. natupad ko na yung mga pangarap ko at matutupad ko yung iba pa.. pero lam nyo yung feeling pag sa likod ng isip mo eh andun yung ideya na matupad ko man lahat, mag-isa naman ako.. parang la rin lang kwenta. Pano yun, pag natupad ko na lahat eh, papangarapin ko na sana kuhanin na ko ni Lord kasi nagawa ko na lahat dito sa earth. Wag naman sanang ganun.

Love ako ni Lord. Tingin ko naman eh bibigyan nya ko ng taong gusto ko. At take note ha... yung madaling utusan. ^o^

The Anime Report

2006-05-21T04:35:00.000+09:00

Here's my field report from the land where anime originated. I think I have to do this before my overseas assignment ends.

Samurai X is not as popular here as in RP. The people I've talked to is not aware of this anime. And I thought Rorouni Kenshin should be popular here coz it's story line depicts Japan's history. Either I thought wrong or I asked the wrong people. But most of the Japs I've talked to really is not familiar of Battusai.

Current favorites are Detective Conan, Yugi-oh, Pokemon and Chin-chan. I'm able to watch Yugi-oh on local TV every Sat morning.

Evangelion is not aired on TV anymore, but is available on PS games. I found one big poster of this when I went to Akihabara, Tokyo. I guess that indicates that Eva is in!

Doraemon is the all-time, all-ages favorite. Note: Doremon really is the national mascot of Japan. It's not Hello Kitty although Sanrio characters are very popular with the kids, Doraemon applies really to all ages (even my boss who's around 50 y.o. has fond memories of this anime.) And in fairness, they use this caharacter for promotions of cars, food, kid's books et. al.

Dragonball Z although not aired on TV is at least known. I'm not sure if popular. Can't recall. Sorry.

Naruto, Ghostfighter, Gundam Wing, et. al. is not shown on TV. Probably available on stores.

Other japanese all-time favorite but not anime is Ultraman. He's like the Japanese version of superman and if you're familiar with this character you'll know that unlike Superman, Ultraman has a family. He has a lot of brothers. And I think here in Japan, all brothers have their series. The Japs knew about this. I have not discussed this with anybody yet so I could not tell you more information aside from that obvious fact that Ultraman here is really popular.

Pokemon and the Sanrio characters are kid's favorites.

Another un-anime-but-jap character that I've watched on TV and I've recognized is Masked Rider. Of course, if you're familiar with the series, you'll know that there are also plenty of Masked Riders. The one being shown on TV has just 3 members on it. I'm not so sure if it's Masked Rider. They look like that character though.

They show anime on tV every Saturday from dawn to around 11AM. Weekdays, from midnight to dawn. I'm not familiar with the one's they're showing so I'm not going to elaborate. And besides I'm aware of the time because my TV is on as long as I'm on my room. Wheheh.

Oh yeah, that picture--- taken from outside at 4aM. Maliwanag na noh? Parang alas singko sa tin. =P

Moving Out is Moving On

2006-05-20T10:33:00.000+09:00

that's the view from my window on a cloudy weekday morning.

all my bags are packed, i'm very ready to go. i had confirmed the date of my departure, and if all goes well, i'll be on that flight on June 3 back to my "God-forsaken homeland" as most of our kababayans think but which I will always go back to no matter where life takes me.

I love moving out, for me it's moving on. I'm not dramatic with goodbyes, I do not make a big deal out of it. It always feel good when you're the one leaving, however, the emotions aren't as positive when you're the one being left behind.

For me, this means moving on to my next dream. My car, our house... my future. I have memories, pictures, new-found friends and this blog to remind me of my adventures of my first trip to Japan. They're all good. I have been blessed. For others this is an oppurtunity to show-off. Ain't we all love that kind of attention? But not me. I'm anti-social. I'm not comfortable with that kind of attention. (I actually get overwhelmed. If I'm a turtle, my reflex action for that scene would be to hide inside my shell. Wheheh.)

I'm going home. My job here is finished. And GOD, it feels good!

*Thank you Lord for everything!

ang mga daliring sabik sa kwerdas ng gitara

2006-05-20T01:42:00.000+09:00

as you'll soon realize, that title has no connection with the what this entry is about. i just thought it sounded cool and in any case that's how intense my longing is for my guitar. i tried substituting the midi files in tristancafe for accompaniment, and although it helped me improve my timing and dynamics, i still think singing while playing the guitar is still the best way to master my music. but that of course is not what this entry is about.

my "busy season" had just ended. the time i had to go home everyday at 12 midnight and work during weekends from 1300-2100 (1-9PM) is over. I celebrated last Wednesday courtesy of my bosses, they treated us out (welcome party for my other colleague) and of course I did not hesitate to order beer. The boss of course is impressed because of me being a "good drinker" which of course I deny because afterall, "I learned to drink beer only in Japan, I do not drink in the Philippines." And, yeah, that is true.

It's 2AM. My laundry is not yet finished but I think that could wait tomorrow and meanwhile I'll call this a day. I'm sleepy.

the japanese i like

2006-05-13T09:27:00.000+09:00

ang hapon na gusto ko. ganun yun sa tagalog ano? in general yan nde partikular...

tatlong buwan lang ako dito, kahit halos reklamo ang ginagawa ko nitong nakaraan, napag-isip-isip ko na pag-uwi ko sa tin mamimiss ko rin yung buhay dito. kasundo ko na sila lahat sa office, sobrang sanay na ko sa salita nila, nakuha ko na pati mga expressions nila at malamang pag-uwi ko eh madadala ko ang mga yun, marunong na ko gumamit ng chopsticks, kumakain na ko ng japanese food, nanonood ako ng mga teleserye na japanese, pamilyar na ko sa mga sikat dito at ang huli eh, dito ako natutong maglasing. heheh.

suma-tutal, successful ang stay ko dito. i fit-in. kahit alien ako dito sa lugar nito eh hindi ko masyado yun naramdaman. pero mabalik lang ako sa title nitong entry nito.. ano nga ba ang pinakanagustuhan ko dito... yung dadalhin ko pag-uwi?

yung kaugalian nila pag nag-iinuman.

haha! kaya masaya uminom dito, kasi pag nag-iinuman kayo, bawal maglagay sa sarili mong baso. kahit kwentuhan kayo ng kwentuhan, pag me nakakita na paubos mo na yung iniinom mo me magpupuno uli nun. ang ganda sa pakiramdam na me nagseserve sa yo. hindi kasi ganun sa tin. minsan me maglalagay minsan bahala ka na maglagay uli. i-try nyo pag nag-inuman kayo, kahit di masarap ang lasa ng alak eh iinom kayo. ewan lang. basta ako, i love that japanese custom. pauso ko nga yon sa tin. heheh.

Yung picture sa taas eh ang Beluga Whale sa Sea Paradise-Hakkeijima--- yan ang pinakarason ng pagpunta ko dun.. and I was not disappointed. They're divine!

tulad kahapon

2006-05-12T01:37:00.000+09:00

sa lahat naman ng pagod ako yung nde natutulog pagkauwi ng bahay. tulad kahapon, alas dose na naman ako umuwi ngayon. ano bang bago?? nangontrata na nga ko ng makakainuman ko pagkatapos nitong item ko. ahihihihi. i'm in a good mood today. in fairness...

oh yeah, you might be wondering what this pic is about...

featuring...... My HAnd!!

I suddenly realized amidst my very busy schedule that I like it. HEheh. It's not that everyday that I realize I like something about myself. ^o^

ngayon ko lang kasi napansin na hindi naman pala ganun kaikli yung mga fingers ko. parang me future ang pagiging gitarista ko. Heheh. Ang epal!! At muka syang payat. Nde proportion sa katawan ko.

Ocia. matutulog na nga ko. alas dos na ng madaling araw. kung me mapapadaan dito.. try nyo check to... Guitar Kid.. (ganitong level ang gusto kong abutin, yeah!!)

la ko maisip

2006-05-11T01:09:00.000+09:00

1:07 ng madaling araw.. dapat nagrerest na ko.. nakauwi ako kaninang 12midnight... Honestly, I'm suuuuper tired. Napepressure na ko. Parang masama yung pakiramdam ko.. Gusto ko ng umuwi ng Pinas... puro na lang ako trabaho.. ayoko na!

la naman ako magawa eh. bukas me in-expect silang output ko. Ngani kong sabihin sa kanila na hindi ako superwoman! Naman!!!
Masama loob ko. As in. Hindi lang naman sa kanila kundi pati na rin sa sarili ko.. Masyado ba silang mag-expect sa kin.. o talagang hindi ko kaya yung pinapagawa nila?? Ewan. Ayoko na mag-isip. Basta, pag natapos ko tong current item ko, magce-celebrate ako. Maglalasing ko. Gusto ko uli lumipad yung diwa ko.

naknamputsa

2006-05-03T01:45:00.000+09:00

bad trip ako ng nakaraang araw. hate ko talaga ang calculation. at kung inaabot ako ng ilang araw na yun at yun ang ginagawa, langya, sobrang bad trip yun.

golden week dito sa japan ngayon. mula ngayong miyerkules hanggang biernes eh ala pasok. pero asa pa ko na makakapagbakasyon ako. sobrang dami kong gawa. kaya, mangarap na lang ako. pero bwiset, kelangan ko ng tapusin yung putek na calculation na yun! di ko na sya ma-take!

uuwi na ko sa june! yey. nakakagaan yun ng kalooban. me darating namang bago dito. bahala na sya pagdating nya. basta ako, gusto ko na umuwi.

sasama ako sa sea paradise ngayong sabado.

langya.. alas-dos na ng madaling araw.. late naman ako papasok bukas. sa sobrang busy ko nde ko na maharap linisin tong room ko. tinambak ko nga lang yung mga pinaglutuan at pinagkainan ko sa lababo.. at kung di pa ako nagutom at di ako nangailangan ng paglulutuan eh hindi ko iyon mahuhugasan.

kain pa ko ng kain.. namili ako ng sangkatutak na kasoy sa Ameyoko sa Tokyo tabi ng Ueono nnung sabado. iyon ang nilantakan ko kanina at yaw ko talaga paawat. Diosko, tataba na naman ako!!!

Mabibili ko ata ang Roadrunner ko bago matapos ang taon. yEah.